


Watching Beetlejuice: The Musical

by bookworm6570



Category: Beetlejuice - All Media Types, Beetlejuice - Perfect/Brown & King
Genre: Gen, watching Beetlejuice: The Musical
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-09
Updated: 2020-07-10
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:28:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 32
Words: 33,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25145455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bookworm6570/pseuds/bookworm6570
Summary: The main Characters of Beetlejuice: The Musical appear in a room and are given the chance to watch a musical all about themselves.~ also published on my wattpad account of the same name ~~ I own the story line, not the songs or characters ~
Relationships: Adam Maitland/Barbara Maitland, Charles Deetz/Delia Deetz, Charles Deetz/Emily Deetz
Comments: 5
Kudos: 34





	1. Where are we

Yet again, Adam and Barbra found themselves falling through the air and landing on a hard surface, except they were already dead this time. Barbara sat up and looked around the room she and Adam had landed in. It looked like a home movie theatre. It had couches, beanbags, pillows, blankets, big squishy chairs and a huge TV screen. Barbara looked over to where her husband was sitting and made her way over to him

'Hey Honey' he said 'You ok?'

'Yeah, are you?' Adam nodded and Barbara let out a sigh of relief 'Where do you think we are?' Adam started to answer but was cut off by a scream as 3 people fell through the ceiling.

'Lydia?' asked Adam and Barbara in disbelief as the teenager sat up. Lydia looked up at the sound of the ghosts voices and grinned 

'Adam! Barbara! Oh thank god, do you know where we are?' she got up and hugged her two friends. Delia and Charles got up and approached the 2 ghosts and Lydia

'Does anyone have any idea as to where we are?' asked Charles, putting an arm around Delia's shoulders. Again, Adam opened his mouth to answer but was interrupted by another figure falling through the ceiling and landing on the floor.

'Beetlejuice?' asked Adam, Barbara, Delia and Charles in disbelief. Lydia stayed silent but cautiously approached the demon and offered him a hand up. Beetlejuice took Lydia's hand and pulled himself up. Then, Lydia did something no one expected her to do, she hugged Beetlejuice

'I missed you too Scarecrow' said Beetlejuice. He awkwardly patted Lydia's head and pulled away from the hug 'A-dog, B-town! Miss me?' He asked, spotting the Maitland's standing together. Barbara and Adam waved at the demon and Adam put an arm around his wife's waist, pulling her closer to him 

'Uh, does anyone know where we are and why we're hear?' asked Delia, speaking up. Once more Adam opened his mouth to answer and, once more, he was cut off by someone.

'Hello!' a door at the back of the room opened and a young woman stepped inside. The young lady had long brown hair, blue eyes and wore glasses. She was wearing a yellow dress with platform boots 'My name is Amelia and I have brought you here to watch a musical called Beetlejuice' 

'There's a musical about me? Ha take that!' exclaimed Beetlejuice, jumping up but Amelia put her hand up to silence him

'In the world I live in, you guys are just fictional characters that everyone loves and somehow I managed to bring you into my world. Just a bit of a backstory for ya, originally there was a movie made in 1988 called Beetlejuice. Then many years later after that, a musical was created with the same name. That musical is now on Broadway and is insanely popular. Today, I am going to show you the musical just because I feel like it. I will leave the room but there are camera's so I can see what you are doing. Enjoy' Amelia waved to them and left the room.

'Well' said Lydia 'Who wants to watch a musical about us?' Everyone settled down on the couches and chairs. Adam and Barbara were on one couch together, Adam had his arm around Barbara and she had her head resting on his chest. Charles and Delia had claimed another couch and Delia had her feet in Charles' lap. Lydia was sitting in a squishy chair next to the Maitlands and was hugging a pillow to her chest. Beetlejuice had gathered all the pillows and blankets he could find and was laying on the floor surrounded by them.

'Ready?' asked Beetlejuice. Everyone nodded and so he pressed play on the first song Prologue: Invisible. 


	2. Prologue: Invisible

'Invisible?' asked Barbara 'Is this based on what actually happened?'

'I hope not' said Lydia 'There are things that happened that I didn't tell you guys about' Barbara and Adam shared a look with Delia and Charles and the song started

**_Ensemble:  
_ ** **Daylight come and we wan' go**

'Well this is dark already' commented Delia. The people on the screen were dressed in black funeral clothes and they were all standing around a coffin.

**_Priest (spoken):  
_ ** **In times like these, we have no words  
We have only each other  
Today we come together to mourn the passing of Emily Deetz  
Devoted wife of Charles**

Delia held her hand out to Charles and he took it, gripping onto it

**Beloved mother to Lydia**

Adam and Barbara looked over at the teen only to see her avoiding eye contact from everyone and hugging the pillow closer to her chest. Adam reached over gently patted Lydia's arm and she smiled a little

**Scripture tells us**   
**"Sorrow not, for we do not walk alone."**

'This is sad' Barbara whispered to Adam 'Why is this musical so sad? I thought it'd be fun and upbeat' Adam smiled and kissed Barbara's temple

**_Lydia:  
_ ** **You're invisible when you're sad  
Clocks tick and phones still ring  
The world carries on like mad  
But nobody sees a thing**

Barbara got up and grabbed Lydia's hands. Lydia looked up and saw Barbara had tears in her eyes. Barbara dragged the teen off her seat and made her sit in between her and Adam. Lydia laid her head on Adam's shoulder and gripped Barbara's hands.

**Whispering behind their hands  
Lost for kind words to say  
Nobody understands  
And everyone goes away. Grownups wanna fix things  
When they can't it only fills them with shame  
So they just look away  
Is it being greedy to need somebody to see me  
And say my name?**

Charles felt awful. If this was actually how Lydia had felt, he was an awful parent. He had ignored it all and just acted normal, trying to forget what was happening. He looked over at his daughter, who was curled up between the Maitlands, at least she was happy now, he thought. 

**Seems when you lose your mom**   
**No one turns off the sun**

Barbara gently rubbed Lydia's shoulders and rested her head on the teenagers shoulder

**Folks carry on, that's that**   
**You're invisible when you're sad**

'Lydia? Is that actually how you felt?' asked Charles. Lydia didn't lift her head from Adam's shoulder but nodded. Charles sighed and felt awful. 

****_Beetlejuice:  
_ **Holy crap, a ballad already?  
And such a bold departure from the original source material!**

'Mood change much?' said Delia

'Ha! They nailed Beetlejuice's character' said Lydia 'You're exactly like that Beetlejuice'

'Thanks, I think' said Beetlejuice, grinning up at Lydia.

'This is more like what I thought the musical'd be like' said Barbara 'I like it more than all the sad stuff' Adam smiled and the next song started playing.


	3. The Whole "Being Dead" Thing (part 1)

_**Beetlejuice:** _ **  
** **Hey, folks! Begging your pardon  
'Scuse me, sorry to barge in  
Now let's skip the tears and start on the whole  
Y'know  
Being dead thing**

'Being dead thing?' asked Adam and Barbara looking at Beetlejuice 

'I think its catchy' he said, grinning at them 

**You're doomed, enjoy the singing  
The sword of Damocles is swinging  
And if I hear your cell-phone ringing  
I'll kill you myself  
The whole being dead thing**

'I'm gonna learn this song' announced Beetlejuice 

'Please don't' said Delia but Beetlejuice was already bobbing his head in time to the music and ignoring her

**Death can get a person stressed  
We should have carpe'd way more diems  
Now we're never gonna see 'em  
I can show you what comes next  
So don't be freaked  
Stay in your seats  
I do this bullshit, like, eight times a week**

'Language' muttered Adam and Barbara sighed adoringly at her husband. Lydia smiled at the Maitlands and put an arm around each of them, pulling them closer to her.

**So just relax, you'll be fine  
Drink your fifty-dollar wine  
And take a breath. ** **Welcome to a show about death.**

'There's a ukulele now?' asked Delia

**You're  
You're gonna be fine  
On the other side  
DIE! YOU'RE ALL GONNA DIE! YOU'RE ALL GONNA DIE!**

'Uh, bit harsh?' asked Charles

'No, I like it' said Beetlejuice grinning

'Smashing a ukulele?' said Lydia 'Very Beetlejuice, its honestly exactly like you' 

**I'll...  
I'll be your guide  
To the other side**

'How many ukulele's would they go through each show?' asked Barbara

'They probably have a way to out them back together' said Adam and Barbara nodded.

**Though in full disclosure: It's a show about death.**

'So, who's actually dead in this show?' asked Charles

'Well there's mum, Barbara, Adam, Beetlejuice, Juno, Miss Argentina and all the other people from the Netherworld' said Lydia

**Everybody gets on fine here  
Like Rodgers, Hart, and Hammerstein here  
The women's bathroom has no line here  
Just. Pee where you want  
The whole being dead thing**

'Eww' said Delia. Barbara nodded in agreement but Lydia just laughed

**You're just gonna love the folks here  
Yeah, I know you're woke, but you can take a joke here  
And every show I do, like, a ton of coke here - ** **The whole-  
The whole being dead thing! **

'That explains a lot' mumbled Barbara and Lydia let out a shriek of laughter. Everyone looked at her strangely but she just kept laughing.

**Nobody is bullet-proof  
"I work out, I eat clean!"  
Jesus, pass the Dramamine  
Time to face the brutal truth  
'Cause we're all on a hitlist  
Might not live 'till Christmas  
Choke to death on Triscuits  
Hey, that just statistics  
So take a little break here  
Kinda like a wake here  
The scenery is fake here  
BUT THERE'S A GIANT SNAKE HERE**

'Thats wicked' said Lydia. She looked over at her dad 'Dad, can I have one?'

'No Lydia' said Charles firmly. Lydia pouted and crossed her arms

**Welcome to a show about death.** **You're... you're gonna be fine  
THANK YOU!  
On the other side  
HOW YOU DOIN'?  
Not good?**

'Well they are at a funeral' said Delia 'what do you expect?'

**I'll... I'll be your guide  
To the other side  
Seriously, though, this is a show about. ** **Death is taboo, but it's hardly something new  
There's nothing medical professionals can do  
'Cept maybe just bill you. ** **If you die while listening to this album  
It's still gonna keep playing. **

'Oh god, can you imagine?' Adam asked Barbara. Barbara laughed and shook her head.

**There's no destiny or fate  
Just a terrifying wait  
Filled with people that you hate  
And on a certain date, the universe kills you. ** **That's the thing with life  
No-one makes it out alive**

'Oh... my... gosh' said Delia slowly 'that makes so much sense, its kinds blowing my mind'

**Toss that body in the pit  
"Gosh, it's awful, ain't it tragic?"  
"Blah, blah, Bible. Jesus magic."  
When you're dead, who gives a shit?  
No pilates, no more yoga  
"Namaste", you freakin' posers. **

'Thats a bit harsh' muttered Barbara

**From the cradle to cremation  
Death just needs a little conversation  
I have mastered the art (Dies Irae!!)  
Of tearing convention apart (Dies Irae!) ** **So, how about we all make a start (Dies Irae!)  
On the whole being dead thing. ** **God, I hope you're ready for a show about death**

'Thats such a good song' exclaimed Beetlejuice 'That guy playing me is amazing'

'Its actually a really good musical' said Delia 'I mean the costuming and dancing and set is amazing'

'I'm hungry, is there food?' asked Lydia, getting up. She stood up and looked around the room 'Ah ha!' she grabbed the 2 bowls of popcorn and handed one to her father and Delia, and kept the other to herself. She sat back down in the seat she was originally sitting in and started eating. 


	4. Ready Set, Not Yet

_**Adam:  
** _ **Look at this crib**

'Oh, gosh, this is about us' said Barbara as gripped his hands and rested her head on his chest. They'd hoped that the musical wouldn't mention their child problem and that it would mainly focus on Beetlejuice and Lydia, as they hadn't told their new family about the issue. Adam rubbed his wife's shoulder comfortingly and kissed her head

'If it comes up, we'll explain, but lets try to forget about it' he whispered to her. She nodded and curled up more into his side. 

**In all of its glorious antiquary  
Every curve and surface speaks to me**

'Bet you say that to Barbara a lot' said Beetlejuice and Adam blushed. Barbara stuck her foot out and kicked the demon and then snuggled up into her husbands side again.

**Saying pamper and spoil me  
Sand me and oil me  
Come on  
I know to the untrained eye it's boring  
But nothing's a chore when you're restoring  
Apart from frustration, pain, and financial drain**

'I almost miss our old life' whispered Adam 

'Almost?' asked Barbara, looking up at Adam

'Almost' repeated Adam and he kissed Barbara's head

**It's fun!** **Folks say Adam  
Why do you polish your crib when you don't have a kid?  
And even if you did have a kid  
This crib is too precious for placing a baby inside it  
So it simply exists to remind you  
Your sense of perfection is just a reflection that  
You are not mentally prepared to make room for a kid**

Charles and Delia looked sadly over at the ghost couple, who were looking down sadly.

**Adam, why don't you live?  
Adam, just make a start  
Are you willing to take the next step?  
Ready, set  
Ready, set** **  
**

'No offence you guys' said Lydia, turning to the Maitlands 'But I don't think I would've liked you guys when you were alive. You're a lot more fun like this' Barbara and Adam smiled at the teenager and continued watching the video

_**Barbara:  
** _ **Look at these jugs!**

'Beetlejuice!' exclaimed Delia. Because the Beetlejuice on the screen had whipped his head around only to turn around disappointed when the Barbara on the screen held up to clay jugs. 

**Amazingly glazed and terracotta-ery  
I took some clay and made you pottery  
The world will never wreck you  
I'll protect you in a mother's embrace. **

'You guys would've been amazing parents' said Lydia. The Maitlands smiled sadly at her and Adam rubbed Barbara's back comfortingly 

'Thanks Lyds, although we see you as our child in some ways' said Adam. Lydia broke out into a huge grin while Beetlejuice pretended to gag on the floor. Barbara reached out and slapped his shoulder.

**Folks say, Barbara  
Why can't you see that ceramics is  
Simply a manifestation of motherly panic  
By making a baby that's breakable  
Aren't you creating a way of translating the  
Terror of making maternal mistakes into clay  
Hiding away so you don't have to face being a bad mom  
Barbara  
That's what you've done, Barbara  
Just make a start  
Are you willing to take the next step?  
Ready, set** _**  
** _

'She can sing really well' said Barbara 'All these people can, its amazing'

'You guys should try to learn these songs afterwards' said Delia 

'YES!' exclaimed Beetlejuice. Delia sighed and shook her head, going back to watching the screen

_**Adam and Barbara:  
** _ **Here we stand  
At the end of a 10-year plan  
A house, a yard, a minivan  
A baby should be next**

Barbara gripped Adams shirt tightly in her fist and tried to block out the sound of the baby talk. It still hurt her that she never got to be the mother that she dreamed of being for so many years. Adam gently rubbed his wife's back and started playing with her hair, which he knew always calmed her down. They'd always pushed their past problems aside and got on with life, and they still intended to do that. They didn't want their friends worrying about them or pitying them, they just wanted to forget about it all together.

**Together let's leap off the cliff**

'Little did they now...' murmured Beetlejuice

**Fall forever, then smash to bits  
Trapped in a terrifying viper pit  
Of diapers and regret  
Are we willing to take the next step? ** ****

_**Adam:  
** _ **Ready, set  
**

**_Barbara:_  
Ready, set  
**

**_Adam:_  
Not yet  
**

**_Barbara:_  
Not yet  
**

**_Adam:_  
Why rush?  
**

**_Barbara:_  
Why rush?**

**_Adam and Barbara:_  
Soon enough, our hopes and our dreams will be crushed. **

**_Barbara:_  
But not yet!**

'Ya know' said Delia, speaking up for the first time in a while 'These two people would actually make an extremely cute couple. They're so dorky and sweet and actually exactly like the real Maitlands'

'We cannot sing like that' said Barbara 'Thats for sure'

'I wanna see you guys try at least' said Lydia 

'Another time' said Adam, turning back to the screen

'Boring...' muttered Lydia and Beetlejuice

**_Adam:_  
Not yet!**

**_Barbara:_  
Not now  
**

**_Adam:_  
Not now  
Ooohh?  
No!  
See?  
We can't start a family in a house with creaky floorboards**

'Little did we know' said Adam 

'I wonder how they will represent falling through a floor on a stage show?' asked Lydia 

'Good question' said Charles 'It would actually be extremely difficult and challenging to pull something like that off'

'Well theres one way to find out' said Delia 'Lets watch'

**_Barbara:_  
You are absolutely right. ** **Let's add it to the list  
With the cracks in the plaster  
  
 _Adam:_  
** ******The wi-fi should be faster  
  
 _Barbara:_  
This sofa needs a castor**

**_Adam:_  
The bathroom's a disaster! **

**_Barbara:_  
What about global poverty?  
**

**_Adam:_  
What about world peace?  
  
 _Barbara:_  
Then there's the whole darn economy  
  
 _Adam:_  
The whole Middle East**

'You seriously think you can fix that?' asked Beetlejuice

'In our defence, we never said that' said Barbara

**_Barbara:_  
We should learn Mandarin  
  
 _Adam:_  
Yeah!  
Or Spanish at least. ** **  
  
_Adam and Barbara:  
No habla español_  
Dos cervezas por favor**

'What does that translate to?' asked Barbara

'Um, something about not speaking Spanish and wanting to beers please' said Delia 

'Thats golden' said Lydia, laughing

**And that's all we got  
And that's not a lot  
Do we want a bilingual household or not? ** **So let's go slow  
No breaking a sweat  
What's the point of having children  
If we're drowning in debt? **

'Good point' said Charles 

**_Barbara:_  
Now we're totally  
  
 _Adam:_  
Completely  
  
 _Barbara:_  
Maybe eighty percent  
  
 _Adam:_  
I'd say seventy-eight,   
  
_Adam and Barbara (Beetlejuice):_  
** **Ready to take  
The next step (Yeah! Yeah! Yeah Yeah!)**

'Seriously?' asked Adam, looking down at Beetlejuice 'A bucket of popcorn and a drink? And 3D glasses?'

'Its not the real me' said Beetlejuice 'But I do like this guys style' 

**The next step (Zooby dooby dooby, dooby dop and bow!)  
The next step (Zweeby, beeby, boo-bah-bah-dee!)  
The next step  
Ready, set let's- **

'I can't believe they pulled that off' said Delia 'That actually looks so realistic'

'It does' agreed Charles and Lydia 

'I like it' said Beetlejuice. The Maitlands remained silent and hugged each other close, not liking seeing how they died recreated on stage

**_Beetlejuice:_  
See I wasn't kidding  
It's a show about death!**

'Well, that was charming' said Beetlejuice 'Next one?'

'Hold on' said Lydia 'Are you guys ok with watching this still? You seem kinda uncomfortable and sad' she looked at the Maitlands, who smiled back at her

'No, we're fine' said Adam 'Theres something we should tell you guys but it can wait for another time. Don't mind us, we're really enjoying this'

'Yeah, we are' said Barbara 'Now, onto the next song!'


	5. The Whole "Being Dead" Thing (part 2)

'Part 2?' asked Barbara, seeing the title of the song 'How many of these are there gonna be?'

'I don't mind, I like these songs' said Beetlejuice. The song started and Beetlejuice started nodding his head in time with the music

_**Beetlejuice:  
** _ **Ready? Okay!  
Hi! I'll be your guide  
I'll be your G-U-I-D-E to the other side  
Don't go to the Netherworld-** **_  
_ **

**_Adam:  
_ ** **Netherworld?**

'Would've been nice to know about the Netherworld' said Adam

'Wait, would you ever leave me and go to the Netherworld?' asked Lydia 'Because I don't think I could live without you guys'

'We'll only leave you and that house when you want us to Lydia, until then, your stuck with us' said Barbara. Lydia sighed in relief and smiled

**_Beetlejuice:  
_ ** **Did I say Netherworld? Never mind  
I'm the B-to-the-double-E-J-F-U  
And Jesus, I can't spell** **_  
_ **

Everyone laughed and Beetlejuice frowned

**_Ensemble:  
_ ** **Hi! He'll be your guide  
He'll be your G-U-I-D-E to the other side** **_  
_ **

**_Beetlejuice:  
_ ** **Let's all get naked!**

**_Adam and Barbara:  
_ ** **No!** **_  
_ **

'WHAT?' asked Adam and Barbara 

'Bit straight forward?' asked Charles

'No, I like it' said Beetlejuice

**_Beetlejuice:  
_ ** **Eh, worth a try  
I'm the B-to-the-double-E-T-L-E to the J-U-I-C-E** **_  
_ **

'HA! See I can spell!' said Beetlejuice triumphantly 

**_Barbara:  
_ ** **What is happening?**

'Exactly like you' said Beetlejuice, looking up at the Maitlands. Barbara frowned at the demon and focused her attention back on the screen

**_Beetlejuice (ensemble):  
_ ** **I** **understand it's a lot to process.**

'A lot?' asked Adam 'Its just oh you fell through the floor, died and now theres a demon in your old house with a dead marching band telling you to haunt your house, whats so bad about that?'

**But  
The good news is you and your spouse  
Died in your own house**

'Good news?' asked Barbara 

**That gives you clout  
That means the two of you should stick around. ** **Lucky for you I dropped by  
Yeah, you seem like nice guys  
A little on the Pottery Barn and dry white wine side. ** **As for me, I've been scaring for millennia**

'How many dead couples did you keep in their house?' asked Delia 

'A couple' said Beetlejuice, then he laughed at the bad joke. Lydia looked confused because it wasn't even funny, it was stupid and weird and dumb

**I'm the bio-exorcist  
Giving houses enemas  
Push out all the breathers  
You can pray at ease  
Just stick with me  
I'm like a ghost-zombie Jesus ** **(Ghost-zombie Jesus!)**

'This is so weird' muttered Delia 'Is this what actually happened?'

'This is better' said Barbara

**And I do it for the love of it  
Money? Ah, who gives a shit  
I think we're a perfect fit  
Come on, let's make out a bit ** **(Yeah!) (Dead!)**

'What is it with you and wanting to kiss me and Adam?' asked Barbara 

'Not you so much any more, mostly Adam over there, he's sexy' said Beetlejuice, winking at Adam

'Well he's mine' said Barbara 'So back off' 

**It's the perfect day to die**

'Is any day the perfect day to die?' asked Delia 

**'Cause this guy happened to be passing by  
To give you control of your soul  
For the whole "being dead" thing. ** **The whole "being dead" thing!  
Oh yeah!**

'Talented dancers' commented Charles, 'Whats the next song?'

'Dead mom' said Delia 

'Oh god' muttered Lydia, sliding further into her seat 'Lets get this over and done with'


	6. Dead Mom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I'm Australian, so I may sometimes write mom as mum, but in lyrics it should be Mom. Thats all, enjoy!

'Hey, can you guys please not judge what is said in this song' said Lydia, turning to look around the room 'I was in a bad place and I don't know how accurate this musical is, but it seems pretty accurate so far, so just please don't judge me'

'Lydia, we would never judge you' said Barbara 'We just want to help you'

'Well, you guys have helped me. Everyone in this room, including Beetlejuice, helped me get over and recover from my mums death. I'm all better now and I am very happy with how my life is'

'OK, we promise we won'y judge Lydia' said Adam 'But we want you to know that we love you no matter what' Lydia smiled at everyone and hugged the people 

**_Lydia:  
_ ** **Hey mom, Dead Mom  
I need a little help here**

'Lydia, I know this is in the past, but you know you can talk to any of us' said Delia 'And that goes for everyone in this room, if you have any problems we are all here for you to talk to if you need'

'Thanks for that Delia' said Adam 'We'll all take that advice' he looked at Barbara, but Barbara just poked her tongue out at him

**I'm prob'ly talking to myself here  
But Dead Mom I gotta ask  
Are you really in the ground?**

'I didn't want to believe that she was gone' admitted Lydia, looking at the ground 'I was in denial and I just couldn't comprehend the fact that my mum was dead'

'We understand Lyds' said Adam. Lydia looked up at him and smiled. She was very happy and lucky to have the loving and kind family that she had, even if it consisted of 2 ghosts and a demon. 

**'Cause I feel you all around me  
Are you here, Dead Mom?  
Dead Mom. ** **Dead Mom  
I'm tired of trying to iron out my creases**

'Did me and your dad make you feel like that Lydia?' asked Delia, looking over at the teen 'because if we did, I am so sorry'

'No its not you' said Lydia. She got up and sat between Delia and her dad. Delia put her arm around Lydia's shoulders and gave the teenager a hug. Lydia smiled and hugged Delia back.

**I'm a bunch of broken pieces  
It was you who made me whole**

Adam and Barbara looked sadly over at the girl they considered their daughter and were glad, for the first time, that they'd died without having kids, because they didn't want them to end up feeling like Lydia had.

**Every day dad's staring at me  
Like all "hurry up get happy  
Move along  
Forget about your mom" **

'Lydia, I never-' Charles started but Lydia cut him off

'I know' she said, and he smiled

**'Cause daddy's in denial  
Daddy doesn't wanna feel  
He wants me to smile  
And clap like a performing seal  
Ignored it for a while  
But daddy's lost his mind for real  
You won't believe the mess that we've become. **

'We were a bit of a mess weren't we' said Charles, turning to Lydia, who nodded. 

'You were acting the same as any family that lost their mother or wife' said Delia

**You're my home  
My destination  
And I'm your clone  
Your strange creation  
You held my hand  
And life came easy  
Now jokes don't land  
And no one sees me  
Nothing seems to fit  
Mamma is this it?  
Are you receiving?  
I want something to believe in or I'm done. **

'I wonder if I'll ever get to see mum again?' asked Lydia, turning to Charles

'Maybe, someday, you will, but for now, lets focus on the present and live life like she'd want us to' he smiled down at his daughter

'She'd love how we live now' said Lydia 'we're together, living with Delia and 2 ghosts. And sometimes a demon, she'd definitely love our life right now' 

**Take me where my soul can run or I'll be in my bedroom  
Wake me when I'm twenty one  
Daddy's moving forward  
Daddy didn't lose a mom. **

'I'm so sorry Lydia, for ignoring you' said Charles 'You just look so much like your mum and it made me sad, but now, thanks to Delia, it makes me happy'

**Mamma won't you send a sign?**

'Thats why you were so interested in us' said Adam, his eyes widening in realisation 'when you first saw us'

'Yeah' said Lydia 

'Well, maybe it was just meant to happen' said Barbara, smiling at the teenager 'all of this'

'everything happens for a reason' said Delia

 **I'm running out of hope and time  
A plague of mice, a lightning strike  
Or drop a nuclear bomb. ** **No more playing daddy's game  
I'll go insane if things don't change  
Whatever it takes to make him say your name  
Dead Mom**

'That was actually a very good song' said Beetlejuice 'That girl can sing really well' 

'She can' said Lydia. She kissed her dads cheek, hugged Delia and made her way back to her original seat. 

'Next song is Fright of Their Lives' said Charles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any improvement ideas? Feedback is greatly appreciated!


	7. Fright of Their Lives

**_Beetlejuice:  
_ ** **Okay  
Listen up, I'm not gonna lie  
Right now, you couldn't frighten a fly  
Or scare a seagull off of a fry**

'Is this whole song just gonna be telling the whole world how not scary we are?' asked Adam

'You guys can be scary' said Lydia 'Like the time I was going through boxes in the attic and I was opening one and you shouted at me to close it and never open it again, that was scary'

'Sorry about that Lydia' said Adam 'That box was private'

'I know, I forgave you Adam, but I'm still curious'

'Maybe we'll show you when we get home' said Barbara, smiling at the teenager

'That is why you guys aren't scary' said Beetlejuice 'You're too polite and nice'

'Well I'm sorry for having good manners' said Barbara, getting defensive. Beetlejuice stuck his tongue out at her and threw a pillow at her, and she threw it back, hitting him hard in the head

'Ow!' said Beetlejuice 'Barbara, that hurt'

'Oh grow up' muttered Barbara, turning her attention back on the screen

 **You ever stop to ask yourselves "why?"** **Both of you are super polite  
Middle class, suburban, and white  
Well, all of that is finished tonight  
Except for the white part**

'This is all just insulting us isn't it' said Adam 

'I love it' said Beetlejuice

'You would' muttered Barbara

 **Obviously.** **Take your places  
I want scary faces  
Now go!  
Bigger, further, harder  
Not bad.**

'These two people are adorable' said Lydia 

**Sever a head  
Preferably someone you know** **_  
_**

**_Barbara:_   
Look at me, I'm so scary**

'Why is there a head in the attic?' asked Charles

'We didn't put it there' said Barbara

'I did' said Beetlejuice 

'Wait- there is actually a severed head in our attic at home?' asked Delia. Beetlejuice smiled evilly and winked at Delia. 'Yuck' exclaimed Delia 'Thats gross, we live in that house, the Maitlands stay in the attic' Beetlejuice grinned and turned back to the screen

 **_Beetlejuice:  
_ ** **Don't be so vanilla  
Would a little anger kill ya?  
C'mon, drop your panties  
I'm trying to fill you**

'This is so wrong in so many ways' said Adam

 **With wisdom and skill  
And the instinct to kill** **  
**

**_Adam:  
_ Again, we do not want to kill anyone**

'BJ, did you really think you could get the sweet, innocent Maitlands to kill someone?' asked Lydia, looking at the demon

'It was worth a try' shrugged Beetlejuice 'And they're not so innocent anymore'

 **_Beetlejuice:  
_ ** **Fine!**  
 **But somehow, someway**  
 **You gotta make 'em see ya'**  
 **I'm talkin' jump-scares**  
 **The jerky Japanese ghost-walk, plus:**  
 **Learn to throw your voice**  
 **Fool your friends**  
 **Fun at parties  
**

 ** _Adam:  
_ Now THAT is cool! ** **I wanna do that!**

'Can you do that now Adam?' asked Lydia 

'Yeah' said Adam and he did it _'Learn to throw your voice, fun at parties'_

'Wicked' said Lydia 

**_Beetlejuice:  
_ ** **Whatever it takes to make 'em go crazy  
Raising the stakes by punching a baby**

'I'm sorry, what?' asked Delia 'Punching a baby?'

'He's said worse' said Lydia casually, picking through the popcorn in the bowl

 **Scare 'em awake till they break  
They'll be quaking in fright. ** **'Cause you've got some evil deep down inside you  
Put all the farmer's markets behind you**

'I think we proved that we were evil' said Barbara, grinning at Adam 

'Yeah we did' he smiled at her and they high-fived 

**You've gotta work  
Gotta haunt till it hurts  
Through the night  
And give those guys the fright of their lives**

'Scared me when we got possessed' said Delia 'So you guys did scare us pretty good'

'All Lydia's idea' said Adam proudly, looking at the teenager 

**Yeah, yeah!** **Let's start with things that you hate** **  
**

**_Adam:  
_ Well, hate's a very strong word**

'You sound so much like a dad' said Lydia, looking at Adam

**_Barbara:  
_ Perhaps when people are late**

'And you sound like a mum' said Lydia 

**_Adam:  
_ Or getting pooped on by birds**

**_Beetlejuice:  
_ No, what fills you with rage?**

**_Barbara:  
_ Being mean to a pet**

'Well, that is actually very true' said Delia 'Animal abuse is no laughing matter'

'Sure' said Beetlejuice, turning away from the life coach

**_Adam:  
_ Chefs who use too much sage when they make beurre noisette**

**_Barbara:  
_ Over-glutinous food**

'Really?' asked Lydia, looking at the ghost couple 'I can see Beetlejuice getting annoyed and its not even in real life'

'I think its cute' said Charles

**_Adam:  
_ Or when kids call me "dude"**

**_Barbara:  
_ Oh, I find that so rude!**

'Oh my gosh, that sounds like every middle aged teacher ever' laughed Lydia 

'Hey dudes' said Beetlejuice, looking up at the Maitlands

'Hey bro' said Barbara and she laughed when Beetlejuice looked annoyed that it didn't work

 ** _Beetlejuice:  
_ Well, there's lots there to use. ** **Take a deep breath,** **And give me your best primal scream**

**_Barbara:  
_ Aaaah!**

**_Adam:  
_ Barbara, that was brilliant!** **  
**

'They're so cute' squealed Delia

**_Barbara:  
_ Really?**

**_Beetlejuice:  
_ Try it again  
Maybe this time pretend like you mean it** **  
**

**_Barbara:  
_ Aaah!**

**_Adam:  
_ That was even better!** **  
**

**_Barbara:  
_ Thanks!**

'Oh my gosh, why can't we be like that Charles?' asked Delia, looking at her fiance 

'Because you guys aren't the Maitlands, they are' said Lydia, pointing to the ghost couple who smiled 'And they are the cutest, most supportive people on earth. Even if sometimes they can be a little old'

'Thanks Lyds' said Adam

 **_Beetlejuice:  
_ ** **I want freedom  
But to get my freedom I need them  
To get a living person to say my name** **  
**

**_Adam and Barbara:  
_ Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse?**

**_Beetlejuice:  
_ ** **I know that beggars can't be choosers  
But do they have to be such losers?  
Both of them are deathly dull and lame** **  
**

**_Ensemble:  
_ Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse**

'Choir singers?' asked Charles

'This guy is too good' laughed Beetlejuice

 **_Beetlejuice:  
_ ** **Why God, slash Satan, did you send these bed wetters?**

'We are not bed wetters!' exclaimed Adam

 **Even, like, a tax attorney would've been better  
Somebody with gravitas  
Somebody to fear who** **  
**

**_Adam:  
_ Excuse me, Mr. Betelgeuse, ** **We can kind of hear you**

 **_Beetlejuice:  
_ ** **Yeah?  
Well, that was a soliloquy so you're the one who's being rude, ** **Whatever it takes to make 'em go crazy** **  
**

'Hahahaha!' said Lydia 'Thats amazing'

**_Barbara:  
_ Turn all the lights on**

**_Adam:  
_ Dress like a baby** **_  
_**

**_Beetlejuice:  
_ ** **Adam, I don't even- No,** **Get your heads in the game** **  
**

'Wild Cats! Get your head in the game' said Delia

'Not high school musical' moaned Lydia, hiding her face

**_Adam and Barbara:  
_ Let's hide their phones**

'So you guys took my phone?' asked Lydia turning her head to face the Maitlands

'Correction, Barbara took your phone' said Adam 'I did not'

'Can I have it back?' asked Lydia, looking at Barbara 

'Its in the box your banned from in the attic' grinned Barbara 

'Really?' asked Lydia 'Thanks Barbara'

'You're welcome, Lydia' said Barbara

'Good prank Babs' said Beetlejuice

 **_Beetlejuice (Adam and Barbara):  
_ ** **Screw their phones!  
Ugh, these dopes are both hopeless**

'Not so hopeless after that prank, right?' said Barbara 

'No, I give you that' said Beetlejuice

**How will I ever survive?  
Unless they get the fright of their lives  
(Yes yes, we're feelin' it, they're gonna feel it, we're killin' it!)  
They gotta get the fright of their lives  
(We're scary, very, very, scary!)  
They'll never get the fright of their lives  
(Yeah!)**

'Well, I liked this song a lot' said Charles 'Its actually extremely entertaining' 

'I agree' said Adam

'Next song is Ready Set (Reprise)' 

'Ooh, a reprise, this'll be good' said Beetlejuice, rubbing his hands together


	8. Ready, Set (reprise)

**_Barbara:_  
That needy pervert was right. If we want our house back, we have to fight for it!**

'Pervert?' asked Delia

'He kissed both of us and was trying to steal Adam from me' said Barbara cooly, sliding at arm around Adam's shoulders and pulling him close

'Maybe I haven't stopped' said Beetlejuice

'Back off, he's mine' growled Barbara

**_Adam:_  
Well, how? No one can see us!  
**

**_Barbara:_  
We're ghosts, damn it! Let's... haunt this bitch!**

'And that my friends, is what you call character development' said Lydia 

**_Adam:_  
Barbara!**

'They're the cutest people ever' exclaimed Delia 

**_Barbara:_  
Oblivion calls  
So we might as well walk through some walls  
I'm sure we can haunt our own halls  
'Cause Adam we're ready as we'll ever get _  
_**

'So this is a call back to our first song?' asked Barbara 'Showing that because we're dead we're ready as ever?' 

'Probably, but don't over think it' said Adam

**_Adam:_  
If we wanna win back our home  
I gotta get right outside my comfort zone  
**

'So did ya win your house back after all that?' asked Beetlejuice 

'No, we got something much better' said Barbara 

'Whats that?' asked Beetlejuice 'A goth girl, life coach and Chucky boy?'

'Yes' said Barbara, smiling at everyone in the room 'A family' 

**_Barbara:_  
We'll rattle chains and  
I don't know!**

'Chains in our house?' asked Charles 'I've never seen chains near our house'

'No, its just classic stuff you see in haunted houses' said Barbara

**Just wail and moan until they go  
Are you willing to take the next step?**

**_Adam:_  
Yes!**

'Character development!' exclaimed Lydia 

**Ready, set-**

**_Barbara:_  
Ready, set-**

**_Adam and Barbara:_  
Ready, set, let's-  
*ghost noises***

'These people are adorable' sighed Delia 

'Can I just say' said Lydia, turning to the Maitlands 'When you were alive, and before you changed, you seemed like extremely boring people and I like you a lot better as the people you are now'

'Thanks Lydia' said Adam 'Now that I look back on it, we were extremely boring and I can see why people found us boring at first'

'So your not offended?' asked Lydia 

'No' smiled Barbara. The door opened and Amelia poked her head inside 

'Hey guys, good to see that your enjoying the musical so far' she smiled 'I just wanted to say, that I'm gonna send through a couple more people who feature in the musical, I'm sorry but I can't send Maxie and Maxine Dean in yet, but I'm sending a girl scout in, she doesn't appear until act 2, but she looks bored in your world, so I'll send her in. Thats all, bye!' she closed the door and left the people in the room silent

'well, looks like we'll have to wait to watch the next song until this girl scout comes' said Charles


	9. Sky the Girl Scout

'So, think we should hide us and Beetlejuice from this girl scout?' asked Adam 'I mean, we're ghosts and he's a demon and she may be terrified'

'Well, Beetlejuice and I may or may not have scared a girl scout a while ago, and it may be this one' said Lydia 

'Lydia' sighed Charles

'Sorry dad' said Lydia

'Right well, Lydia and Beetlejuice, maybe don't talk or show yourselves to the girl until we explain why we're here' said Delia 

'And us?' asked Adam 

'Can she see you?' asked Delia 

'Yes' said Amelia, poking her head inside the door again and then leaving 

'Right well, you guys stay and just don't mention the fact that your actually dead' said Delia. Then there was a scream and a small girl sat up, breathing heavily. The 4 adults in the room stood still, looking at the girl as she clutched her heart, breathing heavily and counting. Delia leant forward and shoved Barbara towards the girl. The ghost glared at the life coach, but slowly walked over to the girl and knelt down next to her

'Hey, are you ok?' she asked gently. The girl scout looked up and smiled, taking her hand away from her heart

'Yeah, I am' she looked around the room 'where am I? And who are you, you look familiar'

'I'm Barbara, and we're in a home theatre' Barbara smiled at the girls confused look 'This girl Amelia some how managed to bring us into her world and we're here to watch a musical in which you and i and everyone in the room features' 

'I'm in a musical?' she asked

'Yes, can you tell me your name?' asked Barbara gently, offering the girl a hand up

'I'm Sky, and woah, your hands are cold' she said, accepting Barbara's hand up. She looked around the room and saw Adam, Delia and Charles 'who are they?' she whispered to Barbara

'Right, sorry' Barbara smiled 'Thats Adam, my husband. Delia and her fiance Charles' the 3 adults approached Sky and smiled at her. She touched Adams hand and grinned 

'You're hands cold too, thats why you too are together' she grinned at the Maitlands and then her eyes widened 'I know who you are! You're the couple who fell through the floorboards in the house. I thought you guys were dead, because I went to that house to sell cookies and was scared out of my mind by this goth girl and demon' Barbara gripped Adams hand tightly and smiled sadly at Sky

'Don't freak out, but we are that couple that fell through the floor and died' Sky's eyes widened and she took a step back, moving closer to Delia and Charles

'T-then how are you here?' asked Sky 'Am I dead? Did my heart finally give in?' she started breathing heavily and Adam took a cautious step forward

'You're not dead Sky, we are' he reached out and grabbed Barbara's hand 'We're ghosts and we're stuck in the house that you got scared in'

'Wait, everyone here is dead?' asked Sky

'No, only me and Barbara' said Adam. Sky smiled in relief and looked around the room happily

'There's one other dead person' said a voice echoing around the room. Sky recognised the voice and screamed.

'Beetlejuice! Stop that right now!' shouted Barbara, putting her hands on her hips and looking up at the ceiling, where the the demon was floating. Beetlejuice frowned and dropped to the floor. Sky screamed again, and tried to run away but she just ran into Adam. Adam put a hand on the girls shoulder and turned her around so she could see the demon properly 

'Sky, this is Beetlejuice' said Adam 'he's a demon and I'm guessing he's the one who scared you before, am I right?'

'Yeah' said Sky shakily. Beetlejuice grinned creepily at the scout and Barbara sighed 

'Beetlejuice, apologise to Sky' she looked at the demon and Beetlejuice crossed his arms and pouted

'Sorry for scaring you Sky' he mumbled 

'Very good' said Barbara. Then Charles appeared next to them, holding a very grumpy Lydia's hand

'I-its you' said Sky, trying to back away from Lydia. Lydia smiled gently at the girl scout and Sky stopped

'I'm sorry for scaring you Sky, it won't happen again' Sky smiled 'And I enjoyed the cookies a lot'

'Thank you' said Sky, grinning. 

'Wait, who taught Lydia to apologise?' asked Delia 'Charles and I have been trying for ages' Lydia grinned and pointed to the Maitlands. Delia sighed and turned to Sky 'So, you know why we're here?' Sky nodded. Delia explained the best she could what had happened while Sky wasn't there and then they sat down to watch. At first Sky didn't know where to sit, she didn't know any of the people there, and Beetlejuice and Lydia still scared her, so she stood awkwardly until the Maitlands invited her to sit with them. She gladly excepted their offer and sat as far as she could from the demon. 

'Ok, next song is No Reason' announced Charles


	10. No Reason

**_Delia:_  
The universe  
Is more than just space with no end  
La-la-la-la-la!**

'This is just like you Delia' said Lydia, smiling at her life-coach 

'Oh haha' said Delia

**Just think of the universe as a female best friend  
And you can be like  
"Hey, Universe, what's happenin', girl?"  
And she'll be like  
"Oh, nothin'... just running the world."**

'Strange way to see things' said Beetlejuice 

**And you'll be like, "What?"  
And the universe will be like "I know!  
You're on the right track, girl  
I got your back, girl  
I'm helping you grow"  
Think positive  
Act positive  
You are a child of the earth! **

**_(spoken)  
_ Life-coaching! Nailing it!**

'Did ya though?' asked Lydia

'I'm still here aren't I? And your happy' said Delia 

'Yes, thats because you and my father are engaged and I'm happy because I got a big happy family' said Lydia 'But you're part of that family too Delia'

**_(sung)_  
Time to take command  
You dictate the hand  
The universe deals  
Look!  
Science makes no sense**

'Thats true' muttered Sky and Lydia turned to her 'What, science is hard'

'I agree with that' said Lydia, smiling at the girl

**Who needs evidence?  
Go with your feels  
I'm like a radio  
Tuned to the stars  
I found my frequency  
Crystals speak to me  
**

'And what do they say Delia?' grinned Lydia

**_Lydia (spoken):_  
What are they saying?**

Everyone laughed at the similarity between what the real Lydia and musical Lydia had said.

**_Delia (spoken):_  
Buy more crystals!**

'Speaking of that, has anyone seen a package arrive recently? I ordered a crystal lamp and it hasn't come yet' said Delia and everyone shook their heads

**_(sung)_  
Everything, everything happens for a reason**

'Does it though?' asked Charles

**Be a beacon of light in the world  
Put a little "alright" in the world  
There are spiritual guides above**

'So god?' asked Sky 'Or the gods, depending on what you believe in'

'I dunno actually' said Delia 'Whatever you wanna believe'

**Look up and see 'em  
Perception is reality  
Just listen to the melody the universe sings  
'Cause everything, everything happens for a reason  
  
 _Lydia (spoken):  
_ Gee, I hate to break it to you.  
**

'Ooh, someones gonna break Delilah's heart' said Beetlejuice excitedly. He had been very quiet during the song because he found it boring and not as fun as his songs. So he was using a spare chair to build a pillow fort off to the side. 

**_(sung)_  
The universe is just the contents of time, matter and space  
  
 _Delia (spoken)_  
Yeah.   
  
_Lydia (sung):_  
Ninety-one billion light-years across  
And the Earth's a small place  
Where good people die _  
_**

**_Delia:  
_ ** **No—**

'Yes actually, many good people die' said Delia, contradicting her screen self 'Many good people die everyday' she smiled sadly at the Maitlands

**_Lydia (spoken):_  
Yeah.   
  
_(sung)_  
In famine and wars  
The Pacific Islands are sinking  
But negative thinking is hardly the cause  
You think life is all unicorns and rainbows  
'cause you're bored**

'Did the person just whisper that unicorns are scary? asked Beetlejuice, more intrigued by the song now

'Unicorns are scary' muttered Delia and Beetlejuice grinned, knowing he could have some serious fun with that information

**And positivity is a luxury that few can afford  
We're gonna die  
Yes, you and I  
In meaninglessness and alone...**

'Nice positive mind set Lydia' said Barbara sarcastically, staring at the teen, who grinned back

**_Delia:_  
No no no!  
No!  
One day you may wake up alone  
  
 _Lydia (spoken):_  
Okay?  
  
 _Delia_  
'Cause your husband and his boyfriend bought a boat   
And then they sailed away to Rome  
**

'Story of my life' muttered Delia and Charles hugged her tight

_**Lydia (spoken):  
** _ **That's specific.**

**_Delia:_  
So you cry yourself to sleep in deep despair  
Talkin' to the walls 'cause there's no one there  
And you have to buy a cat  
'Cause that's your last chance to have a family**

'Dad, can we get a pet?' asked Lydia randomly 

'Oh I have a dog that recently had puppies' squealed Sky 'You could have one and then we could be friends forever!'

'Yes!' said Lydia, much to everyones surprise 'Thats amazing, can we dad?'

'I'll think about it' said Charles

**Take it from me!  
That your aging ass will have to believe that-**

**Everything, everything happens for a reason  
Put some more fun in the world  
A little "I am still young!!!" in the world  
Be prepared to take your eggs and freeze 'em-**

**_Lydia (spoken):  
_ Is this still about me?**

'You really told Lydia that?' asked Barbara

'I- ' started Delia but Lydia cut her off

'Even if she did, it doesn't matter, its in the past' 

**_Delia:_  
'Cause everything, everything happens—  
  
 _Lydia:_  
Sounds like terrible things can happen  
Because the universe is random**

'The universe is SO random, its crazy' said Sky, flopping into the cushions on the couch, making Adam and Barbara smile

**_Delia (spoken)_  
Yes, but—  
  
 _(sung)_  
Random for a reason!  
  
 _Lydia:_  
No reason!**

'Wow, they're talented singers' said Delia. She looked at Charles and smiled up at him 'You're the best person I could ever ask for' she whispered and he hugged her close. Lydia joined Beetlejuice in his now complete pillow fort and they were laughing about something. Sky was looking strangely at the Maitlands, until she clapped her hands together

'I know where I've seen you before' she declared loudly 'You used to baby sit my friend Sunny'

'Sunny and Sky?' whispered Beetlejuice, 'how ironic' Lydia giggled 

'Oh I remember Sunny' said Barbara smiling 'She and her brother Zac were amazing'

'She was really sad when you guys died, she loved to sell cookies to you' said Sky 'and talk to you. She still actually talks about you. Whenever we pass your house she starts talking about all the memories she had in the house or with you guys'

'Didn't we look after you once too?' asked Adam, looking at Sky 

'Yes! We did, do you remember?' asked Barbara 'We took them to the local fair and thats where they saw the girl scout stand and wanted to join'

'Oh I remember that' said Sky. She smiled at the Maitlands, who smiled back, remembering the cute little girl they used to babysit.

'Next song!' announced Charles


	11. Invisible (Reprise) / On the Roof

**_Beetlejuice:_  
You're invisible when you're me**

'Hey! That was my song at the start of the musical' said Lydia

'Well its mine now!' said Beetlejuice, grinning at Lydia 'and you can't have it back'

'No fair' said Lydia, crossing her arms and frowning at Beetlejuice

**There's no one to see my truth  
If they could look up they'd see  
"Hey, somebody's on the roof!" **

'Think anyone in the audience ever shouted that out?' asked Delia

'If they did they'd get kicked outta the theatre' said Charles, who was strongly against people talking in the theatre or movies

**God, it's mortifying  
What's the point of even trying?**

'Trying?' asked Sky

'Trying to get people to say his name 3 times' said Lydia and when she saw the look on Sky's face she laughed 'Don't worry about it'

**'Cus now  
I'm trapped with no escape  
Banished, disavowed  
I vanished like a cloud  
Of dirty hipster vape  
** **Nobody said life's fair  
Guess they will never see  
The demon who isn't there  
You're invisible when you're me  
** **Whoa, what have we got here?**

'Oh god' muttered Lydia, knowing what was coming next 'I need the bathroom, I'll be back' she quickly got up and walked out of the room. Barbara and Adam looked at each other, concern evident in their eyes

'Is she ok?' asked Sky, looking at the door Lydia had slammed behind her and frowning. 

'I dunno' said Barbara 'Is it ok if I go check on her, you guys can keep watching, but I just think she's hiding something' 

'Yeah go ahead Honey' said Adam. He and Barbara shared a sweet, short kiss, before Barbara got up and left the room, behind Lydia. Sky smiled sweetly at Adam and Barbara and then turned back to the screen

**_Lydia:_  
By the time you read this  
I, Lydia Deetz, will be gone  
There's nothing for me here  
I'm alone, forsaken, invisible**

'Oh my god' muttered Adam putting a hand over his mouth 

'Was she actually about to...?' Delia trailed off and stared at the screen. Charles couldn't believe what he was seeing and hearing. His beautiful daughter had nearly killed herself, he couldn't and didn't believe it. Sky was staring at the screen in shock and didn't say anything, but there were clearly tears in her eyes. 

'Well, you've all gotta thank me because I stopped her' said Beetlejuice smugly from his pillow fort. 

'I'm gonna go check on Lyd and Barb' muttered Adam, getting up and leaving, only stopping to gently ruffly Sky's hair, making her smile

**_Beetlejuice:_  
That makes two of us...**

'I'm sorry but that'd be creepy' said Sky 'Being on your roof and then seeing a green haired demon sitting there'

**_Lydia:_  
Who the hell are you?**

'Ha, hell, thats funny' said Beetlejuice

**_Beetlejuice:_  
Can you...  
See me?!**

'Why do you sound surprised?' asked Delia

'Daisy, its very very rare for people to be able to see me unless someone says my name' said Beetlejuice, turning to Delia

**_Lydia:_  
Yeah...** **  
__  
Beetlejuice:  
You can see me!  
** **I'm gonna have a new best friend!**

'That was interesting' said Charles 'Should I go check on Lydia and the Maitlands?'

'No, leave them too it' said Delia 'They need some time alone'

**_~ with Lydia (after she leaves) ~_ **

Lydia sat outside the door and put her head on her knees. She heard footsteps and someone sat next to her

'I don't wanna talk about it Delia' she muttered into her knees

'Good thing I'm not Delia' said a kind voice and Lydia looked up to see Barbara smiling at her 'I won't make you tell me, but if you want to you can' said Barbara gently, looking at Lydia. Lydia moved closer to Barbara and collapsed against Barbara's chest. Barbara gently rubbed Lydia's back as the teenager cried her eyes out. The door opened again and Adam walked out. He saw his wife comforting the teenager and smiled lightly

'Hey Lyds' he said gently, sitting next to Barbara 'We've finished the song, so if you want you can go wash your face and then do you wanna head back inside and continue watching?' Lydia lifted he head from Barbara's chest and smiled at Adam

'Thanks guys' she said. Lydia got up and left for the bathroom. Barbara turned to Adam 

'What happened in there?' she asked, wondering what was so bad that Lydia didn't want them to see. Adam sighed and wondered how Barbara was going to react

'Lydia was about to commit suicide' he said quietly. Barbara gasped and tears welled up in her eyes. Adam put an arm around her and kissed her temple 'Its ok though, Beetlejuice stopped her and she's here with us and she's happy' he said gently, rubbing her shoulder

'Guess thats one good thing that green haired demon did' she said lightly. Lydia exited the bathroom looking a lot happier and was immediately attacked in a hug by Barbara. 

'I'm guessing Adam told you' Lydia said, patting Barbara's back. The ghost nodded and Lydia smiled. 'I'm fine now Barb, I promise. I am very happy with you and Adam and Delia and Dad' Barbara nodded again and squeezed Lydia tightly. 'Come on, lets go back in, they'll be wondering where we are' she grabbed Barbara's hand and reached for Adams. Together, the three of them walked back into the room. Charles and Delia looked up at Lydia with concern but Lydia smiled at them and sat down in her seat

'Are you ok Lydia?' asked Charles

'I'm fine dad' said Lydia 'And I don't really wanna talk about it, so can we move onto the next song please?' she asked

'Of course, its called Say My Name' said Charles


	12. Say My Name

'If this is actually what I think its about, BJ is gonna get really annoyed' laughed Lydia, looking down at the demon who was still in his pillow fort. Beetlejuice frowned and poked his tongue out at Lydia, who did the same back to him.

_**Beetlejuice:** _   
**You could use a buddy**   
**Don't you want a pal?**   
**(Yes I do! Yes I do!)**

'Just like the real BJ' said Lydia 'Annoying'

'That hurt Lyds' said Beetlejuice, putting a hand to where his heart would be

**Girl, the way I see it**   
**Your daddy should be leavin'**

'Ya know Lyds, we could still get rid of him' said Beetlejuice

'Even if you got rid of me and Delia' said Charles, turning to the demon 'The Maitlands are always in the attic, and I know they'd take care of Lyds for us' he smiled at the ghost couple, who smiled back

'Of course we would' said Adam. Little did Charles know, the small comment had made the Maitlands feel so happy and made them feel like they had a proper family. Barbara was grinning like a crazy person and Adam hugged her closer to his side. 

**And you should stick around  
(And kill him!)**

'I would never kill my father, no matter how mad we got at each other' said Lydia, looking over at her father 

_**Lydia:**   
_ **What?**

'And just for future reference, I'd never kill Delia or anyone in my family BJ' Lydia went to the Demon's pillow fort and sat inside it

**_Beetlejuice:_  
Nothing  
** **So, Lydia, don't end yourself**

'I never will again, I promise' said Lydia to the room at large, making everyone smile happily

**Defend yourself  
Daddy is the one you should maim  
Together we'll exterminate, assassinate**

**_Lydia:_  
No  
  
 _Beetlejuice:  
_** **The finer points can wait  
But first you gotta say my name**

'BJ, I'll never say your name 3 times again ever again' said Lydia 'Thats why your called Beej or BJ'

'Hey! At least I gotta nickname' said Beetlejuice

'Ok, Lawrence' said Barbara, and the Demon groaned

'Wait! Was no one gonna tell me that his name is Lawrence?!' asked Lydia, turning to look around the room

'You're name is Lawrence?' Asked Delia. Beetlejuice nodded and and Delia giggled a bit

'No one mention my first name' said Beetlejuice 'As far as anyone here is concerned, my name is BJ' 

**Go ahead and jump but that won't stop him  
Here you got a solid plan B option  
I can bring your daddy so much pain  
All you gotta do is say my name  
Girl, just say it three times in a row  
Then you won't believe how far I'll go  
I'm on the bench, but coach  
Just put me in the game**

'I'm sorry, but what coach would ever put you in a game?' asked Lydia

'I've played games with dead football teams before, in the Netherworld' said Beetlejuice

'Oh I remember them' said Charles and Lydia nodded in agreement 

**All you gotta do is say my name** **  
_  
Lydia:_  
I don't know your name** **  
**

'This is gonna be so annoying' muttered Beetlejuice and Lydia smiled, happy that the demon was gonna be annoyed

**_Beetlejuice:_  
Well, I can't say it  
  
** **_Lydia:_  
How 'bout a game of charades?** **_  
_ **

'Is this actually how it happened?' asked Sky 

'Sorta' said Lydia 'This version seems funnier'

**_Beetlejuice:_  
Yes, let's play it** **  
_  
Lydia:_  
Two words** **  
_  
Beetlejuice:_  
Right** **  
** **_  
Lydia:_ ** **  
Second word** **  
** **_  
Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
Uh-huh** **  
** **_  
Lydia:_ ** **  
Drink?** **_  
_ **

'How did you get drink, its clearly juice!' said Beetlejuice 

'Juice is a drink' said Lydia and Beetlejuice groaned, already annoyed

**_Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
No** **  
** **_  
Lydia:_ ** **  
Beverage?** **_  
_ **

'Beverage?' asked Beetlejuice, turning to look at Lydia 'Beverage?'

'Its not actually me' said Lydia, putting her hands up 'cool it BJ'

**_Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
No** **_  
_ **

**_Lydia:  
_ ** **Wine?  
**

**_Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
No** **  
** **_  
Lydia:_ ** **  
Juice?  
**

'Finally!' said Beetlejuice

'Took me nearly an hour in real life' said Lydia 

**_Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
Yes** **_  
_ **

**_Lydia:  
_ ** **Okay  
** **First word**

**_Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
Okay** **  
** **_  
Lydia:_ ** **  
Bug?** **_  
_ **

'He's shaking' announced Lydia 'Thats how mad he is'

**_Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
No** **  
** **_  
Lydia:_ ** **  
Ant?** **  
** **_  
Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
Close, but no** **  
** **_  
Lydia:_ ** **  
Beetle?**

'YES!' exclaimed Beetlejuice 'FINALLY'

**_Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
Yes  
  
** **_Lydia:_ ** **  
Betelgeuse?** **_  
_ **

'Wait, if people say his name in the musical, does it count?' asked Adam to the room at large

'I don't know, thats actually a very good question' said Charles. The door opened and Amelia poked her head inside the door

'Hey! No it doesn't count because you are technically fictional characters in this world' she said 'Also, I'm gonna sit in on the rest of this song because I'm bringing a few more people in after this song' 

**_Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
Wow, I'm impressed  
And all you gotta do is say my name three times  
Three times in a row it must be spoken  
Unbroken  
Ready?** **_  
_ **

'Wait, can you imagine if we just had to say his name 3 times randomly?' asked Lydia 'That'd be awful'

'I've seen comments saying that Beej should've just told Lydia to say his name 4 times' said Amelia. Lydia's eyes widened and Beetlejuice face palmed

'That makes so much sense' he groaned 'why didn't I think of that?'

**_Lydia:_ ** **  
Yeah** **  
** **_  
Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
Okay, go** **  
** **_  
Lydia:_ ** **  
Betelgeuse** **_  
_ **

**_Beetlejuice:  
_ ** **Yes**

Beetlejuice was getting excited, even though he knew Lydia wasn't going to say his name. Just hearing his name said aloud was making him excited 

**_Lydia:_ ** **  
Betelgeuse** **  
** **_  
Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
Yes** **  
** **_  
Lydia:_ ** **  
Beeeee-** **  
** **_  
Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
Oh, oh, this is gonna be so good  
  
** **_Lydia:_ ** **  
'Cause** **_  
_ **

'What?' asked Beetlejuice 'I was enjoying that'

**_Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
What?** **  
** **_  
Lydia:_ ** **  
** **You're so smart  
A stand-up bro  
I'll think about your offer  
Let you know  
But I prefer my chances down below  
Betelgeuse** **_  
_ **

'You still feel like that?' asked Charles

'Nope!' said Lydia 'I am perfectly happy with my life and everyone in it'

**_Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
Yes** **  
** **_  
Lydia:_ ** **  
B** **etelgeuse** **_  
_ **

**_Beetlejuice:  
_ ** **Yes**

**_Lydia:_ ** **  
Being young and female doesn't mean that I'm an easy mark**

Barbara and Delia smiled at what Lydia had said. Girl Power, the both thought

**I've been swimming with piranhas  
I don't need a shark  
Yes, life sucks  
But not that much**

'You don't feel that way anymore?' asked Delia 

'No' sighed Lydia

**Okay, Betelgeuse  
Betelgeuse  
Be a doll and spare the lecture** **  
** **_  
Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
I'm offering you a full-time spectre  
** **  
_Lydia:_  
Are you any good?** **  
** **_  
Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
You bet'cha  
Trust me, baby** **  
** **_  
Lydia:_ ** **  
I just met ya  
Really it's a flattering offer** **  
** **_  
Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
Don't you wanna see dad suffer?  
** **I think I'd rather just jump off** **_  
_ **

'Not anymore!' said Lydia quickly before her family could say anything

**_Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
No** **  
** **_  
Lydia:_ ** **  
I may be suicidal  
But Betelgeuse, it's not as if I've lost my mind**

'At least I was that smart' said Lydia

**_Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
So, playing hardball, huh?  
You are tougher than you look** **_  
_ **

'I agree with that' said Beetlejuice 'You are a lot more stubborn than you look'

**_Lydia:_ ** **  
Just wanna make sure I know who I'm working with  
Got any references?** **  
** **_  
Barbara:_ ** **  
Lydia, there you are** **  
** **_  
Adam:_ ** **  
Are you alright?** **_  
_ **

'The Maitlands go into parent mode whenever Lydia's in trouble' said Beetlejuice

'Yeah, and do you have a problem with that?' asked Lydia, getting defensive and protective of the Maitlands. 

'No no no' said Beetlejuice quickly

'Good' said Lydia and she turned back to the screen 

**_Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
A-Dog, B-Town, my old pals** **_  
_ **

**_Adam:_ ** **  
You get away from her  
Lydia, this is a dangerously unstable individual**

'Thank you two for looking out for her' said Charles 

'It was no problem' said Adam 'She's a great kid' Lydia looked up at Adam and smiled warmly at him

**_Barbara:_ ** **  
Betelgeuse is sexy** **_  
_ **

Barbara choked and coughed loudly 'I'm sorry, what?' 

'Ahh, this is when I possessed you two' said Beetlejuice fondly 'I remember that' Barbara glared at the demon

**_Adam:_ ** **  
Betelgeuse is smart** **_  
_ **

'Thanks Sexy' said Beetlejuice. Adam blushed and started spluttering and stuttering 

'BJ, stop teasing him' said Lydia

**_Adam and Barbara:_ ** **  
BJ is a graduate of Juilliard!**

'Yeah right' said Lydia 

'I attended a graduation' said Beetlejuice 'But no one saw me'

**He can help  
We found him on Yelp**

Delia and Charles laughed 

**Our troubles all ended on the day that we befriended him**

'I think you mean our troubles started on the day we befriended him' said Adam 

'But we also met Lyds' said Barbara 

**Every word is the truth  
Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse** **_  
_ **

'Oh how I love hearing people say my name' said Beetlejuice 'Its a beautiful sound'

'What is the end pose they're in?' exclaimed Adam

'Hehehe... this guys got style' said Beetlejuice

**_Barbara:_ ** **  
What the heck was that?**

'Damn, I should've made Adam say I was sexy' said Beetlejuice 'Or I could right now-'

'NO' said Adam loudly 

**_Adam:_ ** **  
So violating** **  
** **_  
Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
There you go, kid  
Couple of five-star reviews** **_  
_ **

'You call that a 5 star review?' asked Lydia 

**_Lydia:_ ** **  
What was that?** **  
** **_  
Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
That was possession  
Any ghost can do that in less than one lesson** **_  
_ **

'Hey! Just a question, can ghosts stop themselves from being possessed by other ghosts?' asked Sky, looking from the 2 ghosts to the demon

'Uhh, I've never tried it' said Adam. He stood up and started to posses Barbara but she stuck her hands out and Adam flew back a few feet

'Oh my gosh, are you ok?' asked Barbara, standing up and rushing over to Adam. She grabbed his face in her hands and stared into his eyes 'Can you see me?'

'Barb, Honey, I'm fine' said Adam. 'But theres your answer Sky'

**_Lydia:_ ** **  
Any ghost?** **  
** **_  
Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
Pretty much, any ghost'll do sure** **_  
_ **

'You really weren't thinking that day, were you BJ' said Lydia

**_Lydia:_ ** **  
Then, Betelgeuse, what do I need you for?** **_  
_ **

'Lydia Deetz is savage!' said Sky, then she blushed realising she'd said it allowed

**_Beetlejuice:_ ** **  
Woah, woah, woah woah woah  
Hold up, hold up, girl, I'm your pal  
They're sweet, but I'm a demon straight from Hell**

'Aww, Beej, you think we're sweet?' said Barbara 'Stop, you're making me blush'

'You guys are not sweet anymore' said Beetlejuice 'You' he pointed at Barbara 'are a lot stronger than you seem, and you' he pointed at Adam 'are sexy as hell' Adam blushed and Beetlejuice laughed

**I know, I went a little hard on the sell  
But we're BF-F-F-F's forever  
** **Agh** **_  
_ **

'Did that hurt you at all?' asked Lydia looking at the demon

'It hurt my heart that you pushed me off the house, but no it didn't hurt me' said Beetlejuice

**_Adam and Barbara:_  
Lydia!  
  
** **_Lydia:_ ** **  
What? He was already dead**

'You have a valid point' said Charles

'That doesn't make it any better that you pushed a demon off of our house' said Delia

**And you heard what he said, any ghost can do that possession stuff  
** **We don't need that demon  
The three of us alone can wreck dad's evening**

'Well, you certainly did that' said Charles, looking at the Maitlands

'Scared me half to death' said Delia 

'Now that I think about it, it would be really weird to just start randomly singing a song' said Barbara 

'And getting attacked by a PIG!' exclaimed Delia 'When you're a vegan!' Lydia laughed 

**Together we can make a grown man weep  
Guys, I got a dinner date to keep** **  
_  
Adam:_  
Okay, so what's the plan?** **_  
_ **

'How come you agree with her straight away and you don't even wanna go near me?' asked Beetlejuice

'Your creepy' said Barbara

'Thank you'

'Not what I meant'

**_Lydia (Adam and Barbara):_ ** **  
Teach dad a lesson  
He's gonna freak when we possess him  
** **So he wants the perfect daughter  
**

'I didn't want the perfect daughter' said Charles 'I wanted you to be yourself and not just mope around all day'

'I know dad, I know' said Lydia 

**I'll lead that lamb to slaughter  
Yeah, I got game  
I'm gonna make him say my name**

'The little dance they're doing is the cutest' said Sky 

**(Make him say your name)  
I'll make him say my name  
(Make him say your name)  
I'll make him say my name  
(Make him say your name)  
Not running away  
I'll make him say my name**

'Come on! Only the ghosts said it 3 times' said Beetlejuice 

'Was that actually what happened?' asked Sky 

'Something like that, yeah' said Lydia, she turned to Amelia 'Whats next?'

'I'm gonna send Maxie and Maxine Dean through and then you can watch the final song from Act 1' said Amelia 'Then, I'll come in and we can see what you wanna do next'

'I think I know exactly what this next song is gonna be about' said Lydia, grinning and looking at the Maitlands


	13. Day-O (The Banana Boat Song)/Act I Finale

'So, how do we explain to Maxie and Maxine that ghosts possessed them and now we live with those ghosts and they are our family and theres a musical about our lives?' asked Charles

'Say that' said Amelia 'Or don't say anything at all. Oh, Adam, Barbara, Sky, you might wanna move, because they're gonna land on that couch' advised Amelia. The 3 mentioned people quickly scrambled up and went to stand by Delia and Charles. There was the sound of screaming and 2 figures fell through the ceiling 

'What the hell is going on?' asked Maxie, sitting up 'Oh, I should've known it would involve you' he said, seeing Charles and Delia 

'Hello Maxie' said Charles 'Hello Maxine, you look lovely as always'

'What is going on?' asked Maxine

'Uhh, you see there was a musical made about what happened at the haunted house I moved into, and this song features you two' explained Charles quickly 

'Right, and who the hell are they?' asked Maxie, pointing to the Maitlands, Sky and Amelia 

'This is Sky, she's a local girl scout and new friend of ours' said Charles 'Thats Amelia, the person responsible for us being here and the couple is Adam and Barbara Maitland'

'Didn't those people fall through the floor of their house?' asked Maxie 'I saw it in the paper'

'Yes, they did' said Charles 'They are ghosts'

'What?' shrieked Maxine 

'Listen' said Amelia 'You two can leave if you want to' 

'Yes' said Maxie and Maxine nodded. Amelia smiled and snapped her fingers and they disappeared. 

'Thank you' said Charles, sitting down on the couch 'I don't want to deal with them anymore'

'All good' said Amelia 'Should we watch it?'

'Sure' said Charles. The Maitlands and Sky sat back on the couch. Barbara was curled up into Adam's side when she noticed Sky shivering. Barbara got up and snatched a blanket from Beetlejuice's pillow fort and wrapped it around the young girl. Sky smiled gratefully at Barbara, who smiled back and sat next to Adam, laying her head on his chest. 

**_Delia (spoken):_  
Business friends**

'Oh Delia, I'm so glad you've changed since then' said Lydia 

'Honestly, I am too' said Delia 

**I have only known this amazing  
Amazing man and his unique daughter for a few months  
I don't even know how many  
I'd have to check my pay stubs**

'Was I trying too hard?' asked Delia. No one answered and she took that as YES

**But, as my guru Otho always says-**

'What happened to Otho?' asked Charles 'Or should I say Kevin?'

'We are still good friends' said Delia 

**_(sung)_  
Day-O!** **_  
_ **

'Why did you chose that song out of all of them?' asked Delia, turning to the Maitlands

'We were brainstorming what to do, and Barb started humming it under her breath and Lydia decided to use it' said Adam 

'What did you guys do?' asked Sky, who had no idea what was going on. Lydia grinned at the young girl, and Sky knew it couldn't be anything good. 

**_Maxie:_  
What?  
  
 _Lydia:_  
What's going on Delia?  
Are you alright?** **_  
_ **

'This must've been fun to do' said Sky 

'We can possess you and make you sing a random song if you want Sky' said Barbara 

'No thank you' said Sky quickly, making everyone laugh 

**_Delia (spoken):_  
Um, I-I am so sorry  
I don't-I don't know what just happened  
I meant to say-  
 _(sung)_  
Me say day, me say day, me say day, me say day, me say day-o!** **_  
_ **

'Who actually did the possessing?' asked Delia, looking at the Maitlands

'Uhh, I was possessing you at this point' said Barbara 'But we switched between us and honestly just had fun with it'

'I'm sure you did' said Delia 

**_Charles:_  
Delia?  
Do you need to lie down?  
**

'You guys handled the situation very well' said Adam 

'At first' said Lydia 'Once you 2 got more comfortable with the idea, it escalated quickly and got weird real fast'

'Really? What happened?' asked Sky, bouncing up and down in her seat excitedly 

'Watch and find out' said Lydia and Sky sighed, falling back into the couch 

**_Delia (spoken):_  
No! No, I just need to-  
** **_(sung)_  
Daylight come and me wanna go home  
** **_(spoken)_  
What is happening to me?** **  
_  
Charles:_  
Maxie!** **  
_  
Maxie:_  
Yes?  
  
 _Charles (spoken):_  
On behalf of Delia and myself, I'd just like to say-  
** **_(sung)_  
Work all night on a drink of rum** **_  
_ **

'You sing very well Charles' said Amelia, turning to the man 

'Thank you' said Charles 'But, theres someone else in here that can sing way better than me'

'Who?' asked Sky 

'Work it out' said Charles and Sky frowned

**_All:_  
Daylight come and me wanna go home** **  
_  
Delia:_  
Stack banana till the morning come, brrah!  
  
 _All:_  
Daylight come and me wanna go home  
Day, me say day o  
Daylight come and me wanna go home** **  
_  
Charles:_  
Come mister tally man, tally me banana** **_  
_ **

'How hard was it to convince you guys to do this?' asked Charles 'You don't seem like the type of people who want to wreck a dinner party'

'Um, Barb was happy to do it straight away. Adam took a lot more convincing' said Lydia 'But I think he had more fun with this'

**_All:_  
Daylight come and me wanna go home** **  
_  
Maxie:_  
Come mister tally man, tally me banana** **  
_  
All:_  
Daylight come and me wanna go home** **  
_  
Charles (spoken):_  
Lydia!  
Call 9-1-1!  
Wait, why aren't you dancing?** **_  
_ **

'I'm sorry, but how would phoning 911 help?' asked Delia, looking at her fiance 

'Um, I don't know' said Charles 'I guess I wasn't thinking'

**_Lydia (spoken):_  
It's like I told you Dad  
This house is haunted  
And the ghosts who live here  
Want you out!**

'Is this actually how it happened?' asked Sky 

'Pretty much' said Lydia

**Barbara, the pig!  
  
 _Barbara (spoken):_  
Who wants bacon?!** **  
_  
Delia:_  
No! No! I'm a vegan!** **_  
_ **

'That Pig is the star of the show' laughed Beetlejuice 'Good idea Lydia'

'Thanks' said Lydia 'But it was actually Barbara who had the idea, I just told her when to do it'

'Good idea Babs' said Beetlejuice 'Also attacking Darla made it even more perfect'

'Delia' muttered Delia

'I know your name is Delia' said Beetlejuice 'I just like to annoy you'

**_Maxie:_  
A beautiful bunch of ripe banana** **  
_  
All:_  
Daylight come and me wanna go home** **  
_  
Maxine:_  
Hide the deadly black tarantula** **  
**

'You know, hearing those two sing is funny' said Charles

'Hearing anyone in this musical sing is funny' said Lydia 'Cause I definitely can't imagine any of you guys in a musical' 

**_Pig:_  
Daylight come and me wanna go home** **_  
_ **

'This pig is what you call comedy' said Beetlejuice 'Maybe I should start possessing dead pig-'

'NO' said Delia, Charles and Adam. Barbara stayed silent and Lydia laughed

**_All:_  
Lift six foot, seven foot, eight foot bunch  
Daylight come and me wanna go home  
Six foot, seven foot, eight foot bunch  
Daylight come and me wanna go home** **_  
_ **

'Wow, who made Delia's dress come undone?' asked Beetlejuice 

'It was Adam in the musical' said Lydia 'But in real life we didn't do it'

'That is a good thing' said Delia 

**_Charles (spoken):_  
Maxie!  
Please, forgive me!  
If I had known-** **  
_  
Maxie (spoken):_  
Chuck, you moron! Don't apologize! We're gonna be rich!  
**

'Do you still talk to Maxie?' asked Sky

'No, I work with different clients now' said Charles

**_Charles (spoken):_  
What?** **  
_  
Lydia (spoken):_  
What?** **_  
_ **

'That was shocking' agreed Barbara 

**_Maxie (spoken):_  
I was never gonna invest in your stupid "gated community"  
But a genuine haunted house?  
It's a goldmine!** **_  
_ **

'Out of curiosity, if we hadn't died, would you have still moved to the neighbourhood?' asked Adam, looking at Charles and Delia

'There was actually a house for sale next to you guys for a long time and we were going to buy it, but then someone else bought it' said Charles 

'Oh yeah, that young lady bought it' said Barbara 'she was nice'

'So we could've known these guys while they were alive?' asked Lydia 'Why didn't we move sooner?'

'You would've found us boring' said Adam 'We were very boring people back then'

**_Lydia (spoken):_  
No!  
  
 _Charles (spoken):_  
Do you hear that Delia?  
These ghosts are gonna make us a fortune!** **  
_  
Lydia (spoken):_  
No, you're supposed to be scared!** **_  
_ **

'I was terrified' exclaimed Delia 'You achieved that much. But its very hard to properly scare your father'

'I will scare you Chuck, even if its the last thing I do' said Beetlejuice

**_Adam (spoken):_  
Lydia, we're so sorry!  
It didn't work!** **_  
_ **

'Way to state the obverse Adam' said Beetlejuice. Adam rolled his eyes at the demon

**_Lydia (spoken):_  
There's one thing that can still stop him  
  
 _Barbara (spoken):_  
Lydia, no  
You don't know what will happen** **_  
_ **

'Shit went down' muttered Lydia 

**_Lydia (spoken):_  
I can't keep living like this!  
Beetlejuice** **_  
_ **

'This is gonna be good' said Beetlejuice excitedly, rubbing his hands together 

**_Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!  
I'm so glad you changed your mind  
You are never gonna regret this** **  
_  
Lydia (spoken):  
_ ** **Beetlejuice**

'This is exciting!' exclaimed Beetlejuice. He was bouncing up and down and grinning 

**_Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
We are gonna make such a great team!  
Give me just one... more...** **  
_  
Lydia:_  
Beetlejuice!** **_  
_ **

'Oh my god... YES!' said Beetlejuice. He punched his fist in the air and broke the roof of his fort. 

'Beej' groaned Lydia as all the pillows fell on-top of her

'Sorry Lyds, I just miss hearing people say my name!'

**_Beetlejuice:_  
It's showtime!** **  
It's our house now, kid!** **  
_  
Lydia:_  
Whoa** **  
_  
Beetlejuice:_  
Looks like we're not invisible anymore**

'Well' said Amelia, clapping her hands together 'That's the end of act one, what do you want to do now?'

'Can I see how you got us here?' asked Sky. Amelia nodded and Sky jumped up to join her

'OK, the rest of you. You can talk and do whatever while I show Sky. Then we'll start act two' she waved goodbye and led Sky out of the room. 

'Well, what shall we do?' asked Delia 

'Beej, I dare you to eat Delia's crystals'


	14. Taking a break

**With Sky and Amelia:**

'So, how much time has passed while I've been here?' asked Sky, walking into a room with Amelia 

'When I return you back to your home, it will be like no time has past at all' explained Amelia 'But if you want I can show you this thing I have set up so I can see you guys' 

'Yeah! That sounds cool' said Sky, then her smiled dropped 'But also kinda creepy'

'Don't worry' laughed Amelia, opening her laptop up and logging onto it 'I only use it for this, I am not the type of person to spy on people' she opened a program up on her laptop and showed Sky 'So this is your house, then if I press here, it shows the Deetz/Maitlands house, then theres the Deans, but I don't look at them often. And here is the Netherworld, which I don't like looking at because its all sad, but you'll find out about the Netherworld in act 2' 

'Thats so cool!' said Sky, she sat down next to Amelia 'Can we spy on my friend Sunny?'

**With the Deetz, Maitlands and Beetlejuice:**

Delia was standing infront of Beetlejuice and Lydia with her hand outstretched 

'Can I have my crystal back?' she asked 

'Manners Delia, honestly' said Lydia

'Please' said Delia

'Now as a full sentence' said Lydia 

'Can I _please_ have my crystal back?' asked Delia, sighing. Reluctantly, Beetlejuice spat the crystal out and handed it to the life coach 'Oh eww... thanks' Delia wiped the crystal on her dress and went back to Charles. Charles was looking through a book that was on the table infront of him. It seemed to be a book of the cast of Beetlejuice: The Musical. He was currently reading about Leslie Kritzer, who played Delia. Over on the other couch, Adam and Barbara were having an enthusiastic discussion. Well, it seemed some what enthusiastic. Barbara was waving her hands around and bouncing up and down in her seat, while Adam just smiled at his energetic wife. 

'Guys!' announced Sky, walking into the room, banging the doors wide open 'I've worked out who else is an amazing singer'

'Who?' asked Charles, putting the book down and looking at Sky 

'Well, Ms. Barbara Maitland, of course' said Sky, pointing to the ghost. Lydia and Delia looked questioningly at Barbara but Beetlejuice and Adam smiled

'How'd you guess?' asked Charles 

'I was watching my friends Sunny's house, which is totally not creepy at all... any way-' she was cut off 

'Its actually not that creepy, I do it all the time' said Beetlejuice, shrugging and picking up a blanket 'I was watching the Maitlands for ages before they died' he turned back to his pillow fort, which he was reconstructing 

'You what?' asked Adam 

'Ha! I told you I felt someone watching me' said Barbara, pointing her finger in Adam's face. 'You said I was crazy and that I was imagining things, but no, it was Beetleju-' Adam gently put a finger to her lips and frowned at Beetlejuice, who grinned at the couple

'Yes yes, well' said Sky 'I was watching Sunny's house and she was talking to her brother Zac about how they used to watch musicals together, and that you'd take them to the theatre sometimes, and how you'd both sing to them' Sky smiled at the Maitlands 'Then she got all sad and started crying because she misses you guys, Zac nearly cried too'

'I loved doing that with them' said Barbara. She turned to Adam 'Sunny loved to watch Hairspray, remember?' Adam nodded and smiled sadly. Barbara's smile dropped and she looked sad. Adam wrapped her up in his arms and she gripped his shirt.

'Wait, you sing?' asked Lydia

'I used to sing' said Barbara 'I stopped a couple of years before we died'

'Why didn't you tell me?' asked Lydia 

'You never asked' said Barbara, shrugging. Lydia looked around the room. She thought that everyone in the room probably had a secret, and she wanted to know them all

'Right! I got a game for us to play' said Lydia. Everyone turned to look at her and Beetlejuice poked his head out of his fort 'I think everyone here probably has a secret, so we're all gonna confess our secrets. One of mine has been told, about nearly committing suicide, and we all just found out about Barb's past singing career, so... Delia! You next' she pointed a finger at her ex-life coach 

'I didn't have a singing career, I used to sing in school musicals' said Barbara 'It was only for fun'

'You could've made a career out of it' said Charles 'You were good' Barbara smiled at Charles and Adam nodded in agreement. 

'Delia! Confess' said Lydia

'Umm, I'm thinking of quitting life coaching and trying something new' said Delia 'like a therapist'

'Thats so good Delia' said Barbara 

'Thanks' said Delia, smiling 'Um, Sky, your turn'

'Ok, I have a heart disease?' said Sky, although it was more like a question 

'Do you really?' asked Lydia 'Oh god, Sky, I'm so sorry for scaring you'

'Its all good Lydia' said Sky 'I'm fine, if anything it made me stronger' she saw everyone looking at her 'please don't worry about me. I'm fine. Beetlejuice, your turn!'

'OK!' said Beetlejuice 'I think Adam is sexy!' Adam blushed a deep red 

'Thats no secret' said Lydia lazily 'You've made it very clear that you are attracted to Adam'

'What?' said Beetlejuice 'He's got a cute butt' he sat back in his pillow fort. Adam started stuttering but Barbara put a finger on his lips 

'He's not wrong' she whispered 'you're butt is cute' Adam grinned and kissed her, still a little pink

'Oh, Charles, you next' called Beetlejuice from his fort. 

'With Lydia's mum, Emily, I was in love with her from 1st grade, but didn't ask her out until our senior year' he looked at Lydia 'Bet thats something we never told you'

'You certainly didn't' said Lydia

'I think you two seemed really cute' said Delia. Charles smiled sadly and put an arm around her

'Adam! You're last' said Charles. Adam looked thoughtful for a moment, before quickly shooting a look at Barbara and starting to speak 

'Well, 2 years before we died-' he started but Barbara knew what he was going to say and she didn't ever want to hear that story told again, so she cut him off. 

'I have another!' said Barbara, sitting up and putting her hand against Adam's mouth 'When we were in our first year of high school, Charles was in his senior year' 

'So thats how you know each other' said Lydia 'I thought it was a little creepy that dad knew so much about your singing'

'Anyway, Adams turn' said Charles. Adam opened his mouth but Barbara slapped her hand over his mouth. Adam pulled her hand away and looked at her 

'Barb, they have a right to know' he said. Barbara shook her head and Adam could see the fear in her eyes 'I know you don't like to talk about it, neither do I, but they are our family'. Just thinking about it made tears come to Barbara's eyes. Adam's gaze softened and he wrapped his arms around her. She buried her face in his neck and let a few tears fall. Adam rubbed her back soothingly and turned to the others. 'I'll tell you guys another time, Barb doesn't wanna hear it right now'. Everyone nodded understandingly but Beetlejuice poked his head out of his fort

'I know what they're talkin' about' he said in a sing-song voice 

'If you say anything, I'll kill you' said Barbara, lifting her head quickly to stare that the demon. Then she saw everyone staring at her and put her head back down. 

'Shall we move onto the next song?' asked Lydia

'Actually' the door opened 'I have a cut song I wanna show you guys' Amelia walked in. 'I can see how uncomfortable the Maitlands are, so I'm gonna show you a real sad song. It was cut before the show made it to Broadway, but I honestly love it so much. It was supposed to be in the second act, but I think I'll show it to you know, maybe it'll inspire Barbara to open up a bit' she turned the screen on and walked to the door 'I'll come back once its done! You'll probably cry! Bye' she walked out. 

'Um, ok?' said Lydia 'I guess we're watching...' she looked at the screen 'The Children We Didn't Have'

'Oh god, this is gonna be sad' muttered Barbara


	15. Children We Didn't Have

**_Adam (spoken):_  
Barbara, maybe we should go. I could open the door again. I mean, we've already lost so much  
**

'Would you guys ever leave us?' asked Lydia, gesturing around the room 'I mean, if you want you can, but I dunno what I'd do without you guys'

'We'll stay as long as you want us to stay' said Adam 

**_Barbara (spoken):_  
Adam, we never got the chance to lose anything  
**

Adam hugged Barbara close and she buried her face in his chest. Delia and Charles were also hugging each other close, and Sky was curled up under her blanket again. You could see the gears turning in Lydia's head as she tried to work out what the Maitlands weren't telling her. Beetlejuice was just decorating his pillow fort. He had summoned fairy lights out of nowhere and was hanging them up round the fort. 

**_(sung)_  
Children we didn't have don't call  
Their heights aren't marked in pencil on the wall  
They don't ride bikes, cry out at night  
Or fall and graze a knee  
And their arms will never reach  
For the mother I never got to be  
**

Beetlejuice was now arranging the pillows around the edge of the fort and was summoning more. Lydia was watching the demon strangely, trying to work out why he was doing it, and soon decided to go sit with him. Beetlejuice summoned a couple of darker coloured pillows, for Lydia, and arranged them in one corner of the fort. Then he summoned a sign that read _"Lyds space"_ and hung it up above the dark pillows. Lydia smiled and settled down in her area. 

**Children we didn't have press in  
Remind me that we couldn't just begin  
They laugh on swings, wish for things I'm not supposed to know  
And they never stop to see, the mother that never was  
That's me  
**

This verse hit Barbara hard. It was everything she thought about constantly. It reminded her of all her fears. How she was always too scared of the future and the unknown and how she and Adam constantly felt unready. But death ruined everything, it always did. She didn't know if they would've actually ever had kids if they had lived, but she'd never even get to find that out. She closed her eyes and felt Adams arms wrap around her tighter and she smiled slightly, at least they were still together, even in death.

**Think about all the children we didn't have  
Picture them playing in our life  
Look at them deep in thought  
Think of their face when caught doing something naughty  
Now picturing them three or four  
Picture them walking out the door  
Picture them twenty or thirty or forty  
**

Delia had never had the chance to have kids, but she felt so sorry for the Maitlands. Delia had never particularly wanted kids, and she was so grateful that she had a step-daughter like Lydia. But it seemed like the Maitlands really wanted kids, but had never had the chance. She hadn't really ever realised, because both of them, especially Barbara, had always been so cheerful, it was hard to think that they'd ever had a hard time. She glanced over at the couple, and saw Barbara curled up against Adam's chest and Adam with his arms wrapped tightly around her. Delia smiled at the 2 ghosts and turned back to the screen. 

**Or maybe fifteen, I think you know who I mean**

Lydia glanced at the Maitlands, and couldn't help but smile. Even during this sad song, they still considered her as their daughter. Carefully, she put the spider lights, that Beetlejuice had summoned for her, down and crawled over to the Maitlands. She climbed up onto the couch and hugged them both. Barbara smiled a little and opened her arms up. Lydia curled up in Barbara's arms and Adam wrapped his arms around both the females.

**A daughter we didn't have, moved in  
Smart and sad, uneasy in her skin  
Far too young to lose a mom  
Or take the path she's travelling on  
If I could whisper in her ear, I'd tell her  
"Daughter we didn't have, I'm here"**

'Well, I didn't expect that to be so sad' said Delia, wiping her eyes on her sleeve. Sky nodded in agreement, the young girl was also crying. Lydia looked up at the Maitlands and snuggled closer to Barbara, seeing how sad the ghost looked. Barbara smiled a little more and hugged Lydia tighter. Beetlejuice had finished putting Lydia's lights up and was now sitting happily in his fort, trying to decide what to do next. 

'All right' said Amelia, coming loudly into the room and startling everyone 'Next song is more upbeat and cheerful. This is called Girl Scout and its the song that starts act 2, enjoy!'


	16. Girl Scout

'Mood change much?' asked Lydia, hearing the cheerful music. She looked at Sky 'Its very you'

'Thank you' said Sky, she smiled, but it turned to a frown 'I think'. Lydia laughed and laid her head back on Adam's stomach, leaning closer into Barbara's embrace. 

**_Sky:_  
This is it  
The day I've been waiting for  
Wishing, hoping, working, and praying for  
The day my parents have been delaying for years  
Ooh, I'm gonna sell some cookies  
**

'I'm confused' said Beetlejuice 'I this musical is about me, why are we learning so much about Sky?'

'Because, we all need a break from you Beej' said Lydia 'and its always nice to have a backstory of a character' Beetlejuice shrugged and poked his head back inside the fort. 

**It's not their fault that they're overprotective  
I was born with arrhythmia  
My heart is defective  
Only takes one shock and I could be dead from the fear  
Still, I'm gonna sell some cookies  
**

'Did Lydia and BJ's scaring you hurt you in anyway?' asked Charles, frowning slightly at his daughter 

'Um, no' said Sky 'Yes, my heart did react a bit, but it didn't kill me, so its fine'

**Hike by hike  
Song by song  
The Girl Scouts helped my heart grow strong  
They'd have my back if anything went wrong with me  
**

'The person singing this is amazing' said Delia 'Its actually so funny' 

**Jamborees, soda pop  
Distract me from the fact that my heart could stop  
From tetralogy of Fallot in my pulmonary artery!  
Whee!  
**

'I'm sorry, what are all those big words?' asked Beetlejuice 

'Lil baby Beej doesn't understand the big words?' asked Lydia, putting on a baby voice. Beetlejuice frowned at her and Lydia laughed 'don't worry, I don't get them either'

'I could explain it to you, but that'd take a long time' said Sky 'so lets stick with heart disease'

**When you're a Girl Scout  
Everything's gonna work out  
Even if you're born with congenital heart disease  
And you could be killed by a random sneeze  
**

Beetlejuice laughed but Lydia frowned. She still felt extremely guilty about scaring Sky because it could've killed her. She glanced at the girl sitting on the other end of the couch, and saw her grinning at the song. At least I didn't kill her, thought Lydia, cause that'd be awful

**You're a Girl Scout  
Everything's gonna work out  
Just gonna ring the bell of this creepy looking house** **  
**

'Wait, you think our house is creepy?' asked Adam, speaking up for the first time in ages

'It wasn't creepy when you lived there' explained Sky 'But when Lydia lived there all by herself with BJ, it looked really creepy and unwelcoming' 

'Oh, ok' said Adam 'thats alright' he didn't like the thought of anyone insulting his beautiful house that he loved so much. 

**_Lydia (spoken):_  
Hello, little girl**

'Lydia, you sound like an extremely creepy, moody teenager' said Delia 

'Thats because I am one' replied Lydia. Delia nodded her head in agreement 

**_Sky:  
_ ** **Oh, um, yes, um, hi  
My name is Sky  
And I'm here today to support the Girl Scouts by selling cookies  
Four dollars a box  
Would you like some?**

'Wow, thats just like what happened' said Lydia 'even with you playing with your hair'

'I was nervous' said Sky defensively 

'I don't blame you' said Lydia 'I wouldn't wanna talk to random strangers'

**_Lydia (spoken):_  
Sure  
  
 _Sky (spoken):  
_** **Really?  
  
 _Lydia (spoken):  
_** **Yeah  
What flavours you got?  
  
 _Sky (sung):  
_** **I've got chocolate, banana  
And oat bran, pecan  
Samoas and thin mints  
And one that tastes like apple pie  
**

'I could use some of those cookies right now' said Delia 'I love girl scout cookies'

'The ones that Sky gave me were delicious' said Lydia

'I wish you would've saved some for me' said Delia, frowning

'I'll make sure to visit you guys as soon as we sell them again' said Sky and Delia grinned happily

**_Lydia:  
_ ** **Why don't you come inside?  
  
 _Sky:  
_** **Well, we're really not supposed to  
  
Lydia:  
** **Why?  
  
 _Sky (spoken):  
_** **Pedophiles**

'and then I went inside and met BJ' said Sky. She looked over at the Maitlands 'Just out of curiosity, do you think that Sunny would be able to see you?'

'I don't know' said Adam 'I mean, we haven't met anyone who can see us apart from you and the Deetz, no one else ever comes into the attic'

'Ok, its just that she misses you guys a lot' 

'Maybe we can invite her over with you one say Sky' said Delia 'I'd love to meet more of the people in our neighbourhood, and I'm sure Lydia would like to get to know girls her age' Sky grinned and nodded

**_(sung)  
_ ** **But it's so cold  
And you're not mean  
And no one gets molested by a gothy teen  
So I guess, okay, it's fine  
**

'Big mistake you made there Sky' said Beetlejuice, poking his head out of the fort again 'Lyd can be very deceiving' 

'Oi' said Lydia, she frowned at Beetlejuice, who poked his tongue out at the teenager. 

**_Lydia:  
_ ** **Yeah?  
**

'You sound really excited' commented Charles, looking over to his daughter 

'Did these 2 not tell you guys what they got up to while you weren't there?' asked Adam, gesturing at Beetlejuice and Lydia 

'No' said Charles slowly 'What did they do?'

'Nothing' said Lydia loudly

'I'm sure they'll show it in the musical' said Sky, grinning at Lydia, who frowned 

'Thats good' said Charles 'I'm curious, and by the look on their faces, it wasn't a good thing'

**_Sky (sung):  
_ ** **Alright, I'll come inside  
** **_(spoken)_  
It's so dark in here  
**

'Why did you make the house so dark?' asked Delia

'I was in mourning' said Lydia, shrugging 

**_Lydia:  
_ ** **Is it? I hadn't noticed  
  
 _Sky:  
_** **Okay... well...  
Maybe I should come back another time when your parents are home?** **  
**

'Yeah, you should come over' said Delia 'Maybe we can discuss buying a puppy off you guys'

**_Beetlejuice:  
_ ** **Boo!**

'Oh, thats what you guys did' said Charles dryly. Lydia grinned innocently, and Beetlejuice grinned proudly

'Barbara's asleep' announced Lydia

'Did she really find that song _that_ boring?' asked Beetlejuice 'Because I actually really enjoyed it' Lydia sighed and slipped out of Barbara's grasp, going to sit with Beetlejuice in his fort, fearing her fathers reaction to the next song. 

'Barb, honey, wake up' Adam whispered, shaking his wife slightly 'C'mon Barbie doll, we still got a lot of songs to listen to' Barbara sat up slightly and looked around the room, rubbing her eyes. 

'Barbie Doll?' asked Beetlejuice, poking his head out of the back of the fort

'It was a nickname from high school' said Barbara, shrugging 'I was called that because I was blonde and always in the musicals, plays and playing sport. Everyone thought I was like Barbie, at first I didn't like it, but when Adam calls me it, I don't mind' she grinned at her husband and Beetlejuice pulled a face, disappearing back into the fort

'Next song is, That Beautiful Sound' said Charles


	17. That Beautiful Sound

**_Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
Do you hear that sound  
  
 _*Girl Scout Screams*_  
**

'Oh, so this is what you guys got up to' said Charles. Neither Lydia or Beetlejuice said anything and they both remained hidden in the pillow fort

**_Lydia (spoken):_  
That beautiful sound** **  
_  
Beetlejuice:_  
That is the sound, of clean, white, shorts turning brown  
Torture and pain  
**

'How do these actors scream every-night?' asked Sky 'I mean, its gotta affect your voice somehow, and also, the guy who's doing BJ's voice has gotta be doing his voice some damage, right?'

'Um, usually actors are trained to scream so they don't damage their voices' said Barbara 'and as for Beej's actor, well I'd think he and the person who play Lydia would be professionally trained to sing like that so they don't damage their voices' 

'Oh, that makes a lot of sense' said Sky grinning 'Thanks' 

_***Girl Scout Screams*** _

**_Beetlejuice (Girl Scout, spoken):_  
Breaking a brain (This is so weird!)  
A sound that says  
"I will never sleep well again"** **_  
_ **

'Wait, so your favourite sound is a scream?' asked Sky

'Yeah' said Lydia 'Its so much fun scaring people' Beetlejuice crawled out of the tent and looked at Delia, hiding something behind his back

'Hey Delia, CATCH!' he threw a toy unicorn at her. Delia screamed and jumped onto Charles lap. Beetlejuice and Lydia were rolling around laughing, but the Maitlands were looking at them sternly 

'Lydia, Beej, apologise to Delia' said Barbara, putting on her _"mom voice"_ as Lydia liked to call it 

'Sorry Delia' mumbled Lydia and Beetlejuice, trying to hide their smiles. Then the two of them crawled into the fort and started rolling around laughing. Charles rubbed Delia's arm and threw the toy unicorn behind them, to the corner of the room. 

**_Lydia:_  
The sound of a scream, is music to me  
A sound that says fifteen years full-time therapy** **_  
_ **

'So, thats what I should've done to make you feel better?' wondered Delia 

'Um, it would've been funny watching you doing it' said Lydia

**_Beetlejuice:_  
Trauma and fear, it sings in my ear** **  
_  
Beetlejuice and Lydia:_  
Ain't it the sweetest noise around, that beautiful sound  
  
** **_Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
Ooh! Someone's at the door** **_  
_ **

'Oh, I forgot all those people who used to come to our house' said Barbara 'Do you remember Adam, the neighbours would always come round, and then there were all the sales people and whatnot'

'That was really annoying' said Adam 'I would've hoped that it would've stopped for you guys'

'It has' said Lydia and Barbara raised an eyebrow 'Beej and I scared them all away'

'Hmm, not sure if that was the way to get them to go away' said Adam, frowning

'It worked' said Lydia

**_Lydia (spoken):_  
You wanna answer it this time?** **  
_  
Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
More than anything!** **  
_  
Lydia (spoken):_  
Don't oversell it, act natural** **  
_  
Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
Come on, you're giving me advice?** **_  
_ **

'You were having a lot of fun weren't you' said Delia 'Because people could finally see you'

'YES, DUH!' exclaimed Beetlejuice, 'I hadn't been seen by people for so long, and then I'm scaring people with my best friend, whats not to love?' 

**_U.S. Census Bureau dude (spoken):_  
Hello, I'm with the U.S. Census Bureau, time for a few -- OH MY GOD!** **  
_  
Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
Hi** **  
**

'You really have to scare everyone you see don't you' said Delia. Beetlejuice nodded proudly and grinned 

**_U.S. Census Bureau dude (spoken):_  
How many people live here?** **  
_  
Lydia (spoken):_  
Just me** **_  
_ **

'Hold on, so Adam and Babs don't exist?' asked Beetlejuice, looking at the ghost couple

'I mean, it'd be pretty hard to explain to a random dude in your house that you are currently living with two ghosts' said Sky and Beetlejuice nodded 

**_U.S. Census Bureau dude (spoken):_  
Ohh, and you?  
  
 _Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
I don't live here, I'm dead  
**

'Or you could use that excuse' said Sky 

**_*_ _U.S. Census Bureau dude screams*_ ** **_  
_ **

'Why is his scream so high pitched?' asked Sky

**_Beetlejuice (Lydia):_ _  
_ ** **Panic and stress (Panic and stress)  
Oh ain't it the best (Ain't it the best)  
The sound of heart (Heart)  
Ex-exploding inside a chest (Exploding inside a chest)  
**

**_Lydia:_  
It fills you with pride** **  
_  
Beetlejuice:_  
We're ruining lives**

'So this is what makes you feel proud?' asked Charles 'Not getting good grades in school?' **  
**

**_Beetlejuice and Lydia:_  
Ain't it the sweetest noise in town, that beautiful sound** **  
_  
Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
Hey! You know what would make all this even more awesome? ** **What?** **  
_  
Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
More me!**

'What were you two doing while they were doing this?' asked Sky, looking at the Maitlands

'Um, we were up in the attic, trying to work out how to stop him before he killed someone' said Barbara 'We didn't think of many good ideas though, because we're not the best at saying no to people' 

**_(sung)_  
All we wanna do is hear that sound  
All we wanna do is hear that sound  
Fellas!** **  
_  
BJ clones:_  
All we wanna do is hear that sound  
All we wanna do is hear that sound** **  
**

'How many clones of yourself can you make?' asked Delia, looking at the screen and remembering when all those clones had carried Beetlejuice off to the Netherworld

'Um, I don't actually know' said Beetlejuice 'the most I've ever done is 100 and I only stopped because they all have the exact same personality as me and so it got very noisy and they started fighting' Delia smiled tightly, imagining a hundred Beetlejuice's and knowing she never wanted to see that in real life. 

**All we wanna do is hear that sound  
All we wanna do is hear that sound  
** **  
All we wanna do is hear that sound  
All we wanna do is hear that sound** **  
**

'Cool dance break' said Lydia, nodding in time with the music 'Good choreography, captured your style well Beej'

'Uhh, thanks, I think' said the demon

**_Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
Ooh, ooh, somebody's at the door; alright,  
Let's make some more people scream!** **  
_  
Delivery man (spoken):_  
Package for Deetz** **  
_  
Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
You know overnight delivery cost extra** **  
_  
Lydia (spoken):_  
What a rip off** **_  
_ **

'THAT IS AMAZING!' said Beetlejuice loudly, clapping his hands together and laughing 

'Thats actually pretty funny and creative' said Delia 

**_Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
Ohh! Okay, okay - shh!  
  
 _Pizza delivery guy (spoken):_  
Pizza for Deetz** **  
_  
Lydia (spoken):_  
Hey, what'd you order?** **  
_  
Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
Pepperoni, mushrooms and snakes!** **  
_  
Pizza delivery guy (spoken):_  
Snakes?  
**

'Thats cool' said Beetlejuice 'Just not as funny as ripping someones arms off'

**_Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
Ugh, holy moly, a lot of people come to this house, lights!  
**

'Thats _exactly_ what we thought' said Adam 

**_Next door neighbour (spoken):_  
Hello?! New neighbours?!  
I brought you a pie?!  
It's from the store! Oh I don't see anything -- Aah!  
**

'Oh, thats Judy' said Barbara 'You two didn't scare her did you?'

'Um...'

**_Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
Hi there, ahahaha! **

Barbara sighed

**Hey Lydia, check this out--  
Dance break!  
** **Lady, you're forgetting something!  
  
 _Next door neighbour:_  
My pie!  
**

'That was an awesome dance break' said Beetlejuice 

'Did that guy seriously dance with no arms?' asked Sky 'Thats amazing'

**_Beetlejuice (clones):_  
Yes I hear that sound (Yes, we do)  
  
 _Lydia_ _(clones):_  
That beautiful sound (Yes, we do, it's beautiful)  
** **A sound that means  
No more condescending adults  
Hanging around** **_  
_ **

'Does this girl damage her voice singing like this?' asked Lydia 'I mean, it doesn't sound the healthiest'

'I would hope that they would train her professionally' said Barbara, then she laughed 'What am I saying? Its broadway, of course they're trained professionally'

**_Beetlejuice:_  
Every groan  
  
 _Beetlejuice and Lydia:_  
Each wail and each moan  
Adds up to Daddy's leavin'-**

**_Lydia_ _(clones):_  
Me the hell alone!  
Hey look at me hey (We're looking at you girl)  
I'm finally free (You're finally free girl)  
I was invisible (She was invisible)  
**

'Lyds, can we learn to sing this song?' asked Beetlejuice, turning to the teen

'I can't sing' said Lydia 

'Fine' huffed Beetlejuice, crossing his arms 'I'll sing it all by myself' he grinned 'It'll be BJ's ONE MAN SHOW!'

**_All:_  
But now they all see** **  
_  
Lydia:_  
They're out of my grill  
Because of that  
  
 _All:_  
Shrill symphony  
** **Ain't it the  
Sweetest noise around  
That beautiful sound (That sound)  
Sound (That sound)  
Sound (That sound)  
Sound  
** **That beautiful sound  
** **That beautiful sound  
** **That beautiful sound  
** **That beautiful sound**

'I am learning that song!' announced Beetlejuice

'Who's playing Lydia?' asked Barbara

'Me' said Beetlejuice 

'Who's playing Sky?' asked Delia 

'Me' said Beetlejuice 

'Who's playing the delivery guy and the Pizza guy?' asked Charles

'Me' said Beetlejuice 

'Who's playing Judy?' asked Sky 

'Me' said Beetlejuice 'Its all me, its a one man show, and I can get my clones to play the clones'

'Then its not a one man show' pointed out Lydia. Beetlejuice just stuck his tongue out at her

'Next song is called Barbara 2.0' said Charles, putting an end to the fight that was about to start


	18. Barbara 2.0

'So, is this all about Babs?' asked Beetlejuice 'Cause it'll be a pretty boring song, all about pottery' then he grinned 'and maybe also about how sexy Adam is'

'Beej, how bout you shut up, and we'll find out' advised Barbara, Beetlejuice opened his mouth, but decided against it when he saw the look on Barbara's face and slowly the demon made his way back into the pillow fort. 

**_Barbara:_  
Look at this stuff  
God, it's depressing** **_  
_ **

'All of it?' asked Lydia, glancing up at the Maitlands 

'Nearly all of it, yeah' said Barbara 'Its the stuff of our lives, and its actually pretty sad to look at it all, with all the memories and reminders of what we can't do anymore' 

'Oh' said Lydia 'That makes sense'

'Also, theres a heap of junk there' laughed Barbara 

**_Adam (spoken):_  
You don't like this stuff?  
Barbara, this is our stuff...**

**_Barbara:_  
A shrine to the feelings  
We've been repressing**

**_Adam (spoken):_  
Well, then maybe we should go** **_  
_ **

'Don't leave me!' cried Lydia, throwing herself out of the fort 

'We won't' laughed Adam 'Stop being so dramatic'

'Yeah Lyds, thats my job' said Beetlejuice, grabbing the girls leg and dragging her back inside the fort

**_Barbara:_  
Unfinished projects  
Meaningless objects  
Plans I abandoned or quit  
It's the stuff of our lives  
And all of it's shit** **_  
_ **

'Ooh, second time Barbara Maitland's sworn in this musical!' said Beetlejuice, then he looked at Barbara 'Ya know Babs, I don't think I've ever heard you swear before, in real life/death' 

'Thats because she doesn't swear infront of you' said Adam 'You should've heard her in high school, when stuff didn't go right. She openly swore infront of the teachers'

**_Adam (spoken):_  
What? Barbara?!** **_  
_ **

'Even Adam was shocked' laughed Delia 

**_Barbara:_  
Books on computers  
A "spin-your-own-yarn" kit?** **  
_  
Adam (spoken):_  
Okay, that... Wasn't as much fun as I thought it'd be...** **_  
_ **

'You guys are such parents' said Lydia

**_Barbara:_  
Home-brewed kombucha  
That tasted like armpit** **_  
_ **

'How do you know what armpit tastes like?' asked Beetlejuice 'Because I do, and let me tell you, it doesn't actually taste too bad'

**_Adam (spoken):_  
We are not kombucha people  
We did find that out** **_  
_ **

'Everyone has different taste buds' said Delia 

**_Barbara:_  
Take it and trash it  
Burn it or smash it  
We have to adapt to survive**

'Adam's small what is adorable' said Lydia 

**We can be fighters  
With fire inside us  
We're more than detritus  
We're finally alive!  
** **The Barbara you married  
She is dead and buried**

'Am I allowed to do that?' asked Lydia, turning to her parents 'I want to smash a painting, that woman is so lucky doing that every night, it looks so satisfying' 

**Six feet below**

'I'm gonna learn to sing this' announced Beetlejuice 'I could dress up in a green dress, wear a wig, get the boots and sing this song' 

'No, Beej, please don't' said Lydia 

'Actually, I'd like to see him try' said Barbara

'See, Babs believes in me!' said Beetlejuice

'Ooh, we can have a contest' said Lydia 'Barb vs Beej' Barbara shook her head gently, but Beetlejuice nodded and pumped his fist in the air

**And now Barbara the doormat  
She's coming back in a new format  
Time to let go  
Say hello  
To Barbara 2.0!** **_  
_ **

'Hey Babs 2.0' said Beetlejuice 

**_Adam (spoken):_  
I never even used this...  
But then I felt bad that I never used it** **_  
_ **

'How did they get your personality perfect?' asked Lydia, looking at Adam 'You would definitely say that'

'I-' Adam started to protest but sighed 'Yeah, I would' 

**_Barbara (spoken):_  
Break it!** **_  
_ **

'Why are these people so adorable?' asked Sky 'They're adorable just like you two are' 

**_Adam:_  
Barbara, you're right  
I think I've been hiding--** **  
_  
Barbara (spoken):_  
I was too!  
I don't even like pottery!** **_  
_ **

'Can I break all your old stuff?' asked Lydia excitedly 'Theres so much of it up in the attic, and sometimes I really feel like breaking stuff'

'Sure' said Barbara, surprising everyone 'What? I actually don't like it, I had to use it as a _"coping method"_ but gardening is more fun'

'Coping for what?' asked Delia, genuinely curious

'Oh... um... nothing' said Barbara, laying her head back on Adam

**_Adam:_  
Stuck out of sight  
Like my un-used aluminum siding** **  
_  
Barbara (spoken):_  
We are NOT aluminum siding people!** **_  
_ **

'I'll say it again' said Lydia 'You guys are such parents'

**_Adam:_  
Tragic and static  
Trapped in this attic  
Now Adam is shedding his skin  
No more excuses  
We're no longer useless**

'No more excuses for what?' asked Delia 

'NOTHING' said Barbara, a little too loudly, putting a hand over her husbands mouth

**We've got nothing to lose  
We can finally begin!  
The new Adam is wiser**   
**The old one's fertiliser**

'I'm liking all these dead references' said Beetlejuice 

**It's time to let go**   
**Say hello! _  
_**

'Aww, A-dog can't become A-dog 2.0' said Beetlejuice, making the male ghost blush (can ghosts blush?)

'I think its cute' whispered Barbara, making Adam smile slightly 

**_Barbara:_  
I'm tired of doors  
To better or more  
We could just walk  
But we've done that before**

Adam held Barbara tighter as her expression became slightly sadder. Charles and Delia sadly looked at the couple, but Sky looked confused 

'Sorry, I'm dumb, what does that mean?' she asked 

'When we were alive, we were scared to do a lot of stuff, and scared of change' said Barbara 'So this is _"Barbara"_ telling Adam that she's tired of letting everything stop her, and that she just wants to take a chance and "live" in the moment' 

'Oh, that makes heaps of sense' said Sky, 'thanks'

'Also, don't call yourself dumb, honey' Barbara smiled at Sky, who smiled back. 

**What we cannot ignore  
As Lydia needs us** **  
_  
Adam:_  
That must be the reason she sees us** **_  
_ **

'You wanted to stay just for me?' asked Lydia 

'Yes, of course' said Adam 'Why wouldn't we?' Lydia shrugged and crawled over to the Maitlands, climbing back up onto the couch and curling herself back into Barbara's arms. 

'Is that really the reason that we can see you guys?' asked Charles, looking from the Maitlands, to Beetlejuice and back again 

'I guess' said Barbara, placing her head on Lydia's 'I've never really thought about it' 

**_Barbara:_  
Adam, I wanna stay  
She needs people who won't run away  
Friends who don't stop at problems or obstacles  
Not a house  
But a home** **_  
_ **

'You 6 are the best family ever' said Sky, looking around the room '4 parents, and two chaotic kids, I love it'

'Aww, Sky' Delia reached over and gave the young girl a small hug. Little did Sky know, that the small comment she'd made had make the 6 other people in the room feel so amazing. Charles was relieved that he had a family again, Delia loved that she was seen as a parent to Lydia and Beej, Barbara and Adam were loving the fact that they were seen as parental figures to Lydia (Beej not so much, as he liked to kiss both of them). But Beej was holding tears back, because he'd never been part of a proper family, and the Deetz/Maitland family, was honestly one that everyone wanted to be a part of. 

**_Adam and Barbara:_  
Ready, set, let's go!  
**

'Why can't you make out like that with me?' asked Beetlejuice, looking over at Adam 'I bet I'm better than Babs'

'No' said Adam firmly, for once not blushing 

'Are these two together in real life?' asked Sky 'Cause they're really cute!'

'No, the person who plays Barbara, Kerry Butler, is married and has two adopted daughters, and the person who plays Adam, Rob McClure, is also married and has a daughter' said Charles

'Dang, cause they're really cute' said Sky 

**Time to let go  
Cause the new upgraded Maitlands  
Are charging out the gates and  
They're gonna unload  
Say hello...  
To Maitlands 2.0!  
** **Maitlands 2.0!  
Maitlands 2.0!**

'Damn, thats a high note' said Delia 

'Barbara used to be able to hit those types of notes' said Adam

'Really Barbara?' asked Delia, and the female ghost nodded shyly 'Wow, I have to hear you sing'

'Not right now' said Barbara, she looked at Charles 'Whats the next song?'

'Umm... oh, its another part to the whole being dead thing' said Charles 

'YES!' said Beetlejuice, clapping his hands and staring up at the screen 'I LOVE THESE!'


	19. The Whole "Being Dead" Thing (part 4)

'How many of there are there?' asked Delia 

'I dunno, many more would be amazing, because they're amazing' said Beetlejuice 

'I hope that there aren't too many' said Barbara, shuddering slightly at the memory of her being exorcised. 

**Beetlejuice:**   
**Hey guys, awesome seance**   
**Lots of good old-fashioned chaos**

'You are chaos' said Delia 

'Thank you' said Beetlejuice 

**You lose — in your faces!**   
**'Cause look who's holding all the aces**   
  
**Hey, it's great that you ate up my plan**

'You were mean Beej' said Lydia, frowning at the demon, who was half laying out of the fort, so he could see everyone else in the room

'I just wanted a friend' said Beetlejuice

'Well, you've changed a lot' said Delia 'In a good way'

'What did he used to be like?' asked Sky, genuinely curious 

'Watch the song and you'll see' said Lydia

**The pooch has been screwed**   
**And shit's hit the fan!**   
**You wanted me gone-**

'This is so accurate!' said Beetlejuice 'Its exactly how I felt'

_**Lydia (spoken):** _   
**I don't have a choice**   
  
_**Beetlejuice:** _   
**You wanted your mom**

'Wittle baby Lyds wanted her mama' said Beetlejuice in a baby voice, Lydia just stuck the finger up at him in response 

_**Lydia (spoken):** _   
**Its my fault she's dying!**

'Aww Lyds' Barbara hugged Lydia tightly 'It wasn't entirely your fault'

'It was' said Lydia 'and I'm so so so sorry' Barbara kissed Lydia's head and gave her a small squeeze

**_Beetlejuice:_  
You messed with the wrong book - now look what you've done!  
**

'Haha, thats actually cool' said Charles 'Good link'

**_*Barbara screams*_   
**

'How do they get her to float?' asked Sky 'Its awesome'

'Well, I think I know, but I won't spoil the magic for you' said Charles, looking closely at the screen. Barbara and Adam nodded in agreement, but Sky, Delia, Lydia and Beetlejuice looked confused.

**_Lydia (spoken):_  
Okay! I'll do it, I'll marry you!**

'Oooh, thats exactly what happened' said Lydia 'Then he did a little happy dance'

'A happy dance?' asked Sky, holding back her laughter 

'Yeah, you got a problem with that?' asked Beetlejuice, sitting up a little

'N-no' said Sky, shrinking back a little into the couch and bringing the blanket a little higher 

'Good' said Beetlejuice 

'Beej, leave her alone' said Adam, looking at the demon 'She was just curious, do you want us to get mad at you whenever you ask us a question?' he raised an eyebrow 

'No' mumbled Beetlejuice 'Sorry dad'

'Shall we move on?' asked Charles, and everyone nodded in agreement


	20. Good Old Fashioned Wedding

**_Beetlejuice:_  
There's gonna be a-  
Good old-fashioned wedding**

'Oh, so this is a happy dance' said Sky, laughing at the screen

'Its actually pretty much what he did' said Lydia 'Although it looks a lot cuter on stage'

'Am I not cute Lyds?' asked Beetlejuice, showing his big puppy dog eyes to Lydia 

'Depends' said Lydia

**With some dancing and un-deading**

'I'm using that again' said Beetlejuice, pointing to the screen 'Un-deading is officially my new favourite word'

**With a cover-band is cranking  
And the age gap is upsetting**

'This composer literally thought of everything' said Charles 'Even mentioning the age gap'

**When I finally say "I do"  
I'll be alive and born anew  
And I'll be boring just like you**

'Like who?' asked Delia 

'Everyone' said Beetlejuice 'But especially Babs and Sexypants'

'Sexypants?' spluttered Adam, his face bright red 

'You know it' said Beetlejuice 

**Oh boy, I'm on my way!  
  
Being dead sucks  
Rent me a tux  
I wanna look like a million bucks  
BJ's getting married-  
**

'I'm sorry, but can I just say that the people playing the Maitlands are adorable' said Delia 'Like, how are they not together in real life?'

'Wait, who did you say played me?' asked Barbara, then she giggled adorably 'that sounds weird

'Um, Kerry Butler' said Charles, looking at the program 

'Oh my gosh' said Barbara, she looked up at Adam 'Isn't she the person who we saw play Penny in Hairspray on Broadway, in like 2002? Hasn't she been in like a gazillion broadway shows?'

'Yes' said Adam slowly, nodding 'Thats so cool' Barbara nodded and the smile on her face was huge. Lydia turned her head to look at Barbara, and hugged her tightly when she saw how happy she was. 

**_Lydia (spoken):_  
Hey Beetlejuice, I'm going to the Netherworld!  
**

'Oh, I forgot this was gonna be in here' said Lydia 'I wanted it to show what you guys did while we were there'

'We did nothing' said Delia 'Beej tied us up and kept on calling Adam sexy, thats about it' then she looked at the screen 'Hey, where's my character gone?'

**_Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
What?  
  
** **_Lydia (spoken):_ ** **  
Classic bait and switch!  
Oldest trick in the book!  
**

'Damn, Lydia's stealing BJ's lines' said Sky 

**_Charles (spoken):_  
Lydia! No!  
**

'Like father like daughter' said Delia, grinning at her lover 

**_Adam:_  
NO! NO! NO!**

'Now that, actually happened' said Beetlejuice, pointing to the screen 'Smexypants did actually scream like that, sounding that heart felt an all' Lydia patted Adam's head, unable to hug him because she was being hugged to death by Barbara, who didn't like the thought of Lydia going to the Netherworld 

**Beetlejuice (spoken):  
Why does everyone keep leaving me?**

'Who left you?' asked Sky 

'Well lets see' said Beetlejuice, counting on his fingers 'My mum, I dunno who my dad is, Adam and Babs, Lyds, technically Chuck, and Darla just didn't really do anything' 

'I've never left you' said Sky 'You scared me away' 

'You're my new best friend!' said Beetlejuice, he grabbed Sky's hand and dragged her off the couch and pulled her into a hug 

'No offence mister, but you smell awful' said Sky, but she hugged Beetlejuice back 'But you actually give really good hugs' Beetlejuice grinned and squeezed Sky tighter

**Okay, new plan:  
You're all gonna die  
 _(sung)_  
Today!**

'That poor audience' said Delia 

'I wish I could see this show live' said Barbara 'It seems so cool'

'HEY GUYS!' the door banged open and Amelia walked in. Causing everyone to jump Barbara to scream a little and grip Lydia tightly in fright. 'Sorry, but I'm bringing Miss Argentina in, I've already explained to her whats going on' she gestured to someone behind her and a green skinned ghost/zombie walked in

'Hi' said Barbara, releasing Lydia from the death grip 

'Ok, Miss Argentina, this is Charles, Delia, Adam, Barbara, Sky and Beej' said Amelia, pointing to everyone in turn. Miss Argentina smiled at them all in return. Delia gestured for the beauty queen to come and sit next to her and Charles.

'Woah' said Lydia, looking at the two of them next to each other 'You look exactly the same'


	21. Reunions and Tears

'Oh, I'm bringing someone else in' said Amelia 'She's someone that 2 people in here know her extremely well, and miss dearly' Lydia lifted her head off Adam's chest and looked at Amelia

'You don't mean...' she trailed off when a woman walked into the room. She had shoulder length dirty blonde hair, was wearing black jeans, a hoodie, and had a gentle smile on her face 'mum?' Lydia looked up in disbelief at the woman 

'Lydia?' Emily Deetz looked at her daughter. Lydia released herself from Barbara's gentle embrace and ran to hug her mother. Emily wrapped her arms around her daughter and held her close . Lydia sniffled a little and pulled away from the hug to look up at her mother

'What are you doing here?' asked Lydia, wiping her eyes a little 

'Apparently I'm here to watch a musical about you and your life after I died' said Emily, she brushed Lydia's short hair out of her face 'Why'd you cut your hair baby? And dye it?' Lydia didn't answer and looked at the ground 'Its fine, it suits you, makes you look older' she looked around the room and saw Charles looking at her 'Charles?'

'Hey Em' he waved at her. Delia gently shoved him off the couch and towards Emily. Lydia moved away to let her parents have some time alone 'I- I've missed you' he said, standing awkwardly infront of her

'I miss you guys too' said Emily. She pulled Charles into a hug and put her head on his shoulder. Charles played with her hair and wondered what she'd think of Delia 'So,' Emily pulled away, wiping her eyes 'care to introduce me to everyone here? I've been watching the past few songs with Amelia, but I don't actually know anyone personally, apart from Miss Argentina'

'Well, there are the Maitlands, Adam and Barbara' said Charles, pointing to Adam and Barbara, who waved at Emily 'They are the couple that died in the house that we moved into, so we all live together now'

'Wait you guys are ghosts?' asked Emily, she looked at Lydia, who was sitting on the back of the couch 'You live with ghosts? Lydsie, thats so cool' then she walked over to Adam and Barbara 'Ghost buddies!' Barbara high-fived Emily and the two women laughed

'Right, next is Sky, she's our neighbour' said Charles 'We've only properly met her today, but she is really nice and might be giving us a puppy' Sky smiled at Emily and Emily smiled back 'This is Delia, she's my... uh...' he trialed off 

'Charles, its fine that you've moved on' said Emily, putting a hand on his shoulder 'I'm glad that you've moved on and not spent your days in mourning. I can see that Delia makes you happy, and its good that Lydia has a mother again' she smiled at Delia 'Its a pleasure to meet you'

'I've heard so much about you' said Delia, standing up and shaking Emily's hand 

'Good things I hope' laughed Emily and Delia joined in. 

'Oi, Beej, c'mere' said Charles. The demon got up from his spot on the floor and walked over to Charles. 'Em, this is Beej'

'Hi... Beej' said Emily, smiling at the demon 'How are you?'

'Its a true honour to meet you' said Beetlejuice, taking Emily's hand and kissing it. Emily blushed a little and Lydia groaned 

'Beej, do NOT flirt with my mother' she said, grabbing the demon and dragging him away from Emily 'Its bad enough that you keep torturing Adam and Barbara, I don't need you doing it to my mother too'

'But Lyds' said Beetlejuice, frowning at Lydia 'I can't help it if they're all so damn sexy' Emily raised an eyebrow at Charles, who smiled 

'Welcome to my life' said Charles 'Its a little crazy, we live with 2 ghosts and a demon, but we love it' 

Beetlejuice settled down in his fort with Sky, now determined to make the girl scout his best friend. Miss Argentina was sitting on a couch with Delia and Charles, the 3 of them talking. Lydia was curled up in her mothers lap next to the Maitlands, who were enjoying getting to know Lydia's mother

'So, mum, I actually have 3 mothers and 2 fathers' said Lydia. 'I got my dead mum, my ghost mum and my step-mum. Then I got dad and my ghost dad and my chaotic demon brother Beej'

'Wow' said Emily, she turned to the Maitlands 'Thank you for looking out for her, I really appreciate it. I was so scared when I found out I was going to die, because I didn't know what would happen to Lydsie or Charlie. But I think that their lives are just fine, you two and Delia, and Beej seem to have helped them a lot, and I know that Charles appreciates it more than he shows it'

'We love Lydia' said Barbara 'She feels like our daughter, and we wouldn't want our lives any other way' 

'I saw how you 3 were when I came in' said Emily 'For a second I didn't recognise Lydsie with this short black hair, and I thought you 3 looked like a perfect family. You know, Lydia used to have long blonde hair, before I died?'

'Really? Wow, Lyd you gotta show me photos' Barbara smiled at Emily and Lydia. The 2 women talked a little more about stuff, the two of them bonding immediately. Adam and Lydia exchanged a look that clearly said _they're never gonna shut up, are they?_ and _what have we got ourselves into?_

'Sorry to break up this cute family time' said Amelia, surprising everyone 'But we gotta start watching this again, because there are still a fair few songs to go' 

Everyone nodded and settled down to watch the next song


	22. What I Know Now

_**Miss Argentina (sung):** _   
**I was hot**   
**I went to parties a lot**

'Thats the person who plays Delia!' said Sky and Beetlejuice, pointing to the Miss Argentina on the screen 

'So, is that why you two look similar is real life?' asked Charles, looking from his wife to the dead beauty queen, who both shrugged 

_**(spoken)** _   
**Y'know?**   
_**(sung)** _   
**I was driving Lamborghinis**   
**Sipping super-dry martinis**   
**In the tiniest bikinis on a yacht**

'This is a weird song' said Beetlejuice 'But I kinda like it'

**But I was depressed**   
**Also completely obsessed**   
**An unhappy beauty queen**   
**Who dreamed to be Miss Argentina**   
**I had such low self-esteem**   
**I was a mess**

'Story of my life' muttered Miss Argentina 

**So I gave it all up for the netherworld**   
**I've been here forever, girl**   
**If I was more clever, girl**   
**I would've stuck it out**   
**Knowing what life's about**

'Wait, so was it Miss Argentina who welcomed you to the Netherworld?' asked Lydia, looking at her mother 

'Yes' said Emily 'Thats how I know her, she's really nice, but I didn't get a full on dance number'

'Maybe thats because you were actually dead' said Lydia 'and not a _"breather"_ as I was called' 

**Pain and joy and suffering**   
**Failing but recovering**   
**I'll tell you another thing**   
**Everyone here is alone**   
**So if you are breathing**   
**Go home!**

'Damn, this woman can sing' said Beetlejuice 'also, that was a really quick change, from, Delilah to Miss Argentina'

'It was actually, wasn't it' said Delia, ignoring Beetlejuice stuffing up her name again 'And yet she doesn't look stressed at all, thats what you call talent'

**If I knew then**   
**What I know now**   
**I would have looked within and let love in somehow**   
**If I only knew**   
**The truth back then**   
**I wouldn't have had my little accident**

Miss Argentina tried to cover up her wrists, but Delia had already looked at them. The life coach looked sadly at the beauty queen, and put a comforting hand on her leg.

**Don't be blind**   
**You left your whole life behind**   
**See a shrink**   
**Call a priest**   
**Ask the recently deceased**   
**Death is final and you cannot press rewind**

'Thats the sad truth' said Emily. Barbara, Adam, Beetlejuice and Miss Argentina nodded. Lydia looked around and realised that there were more dead people in the room than living. Wow, this is a show about death! With that thought, she snuggled a little closer into her mothers embrace, and enjoyed the feeling of being to be hugged by her again

_**Sky Diver:** _   
**Don't jump when the light is red** **_  
_ **

'Ahh, now we see more dead people' said Beetlejuice, kicking his legs back and leaning against the wall of his fort, only to fall through the blanket and hit his head on the floor 'Fuck, that hurt' he exclaimed 

'Language' said Adam and Barbara simultaneously, before looking at each other and bursting out laughing

**_Lady:_ **   
**Toasters should be used for bread**

'Hey Lyds, wanna play with toasters when we get home?' asked Beetlejuice 

'Yes!' said Lydia 

**_Man:_ **   
**Never smoke cigars in bed** _  
_

'And fire?' asked Beetlejuice 

'Yes!' said Lydia

'Not again, please' said Barbara, she looked at Emily 'These 2 decided it'd be funny to burn pasta, but ended up nearly burning the house down' Emily sighed and looked down at her daughter, who grinned up at her innocently

_**Football Player:** _   
**Nietzsche was right, y'know, to live is to suffer, bro**   
  
**_Man 2:_ **   
**Don't cheat on the one you wed**

'I wonder what you two would say' said Beetlejuice, looking at the Maitlands 'How bout "Don't dance on creaky floorboards because they'll break and you'll fall to your deaths, but then you'll meet a really cool, sexy and attractive demon, who helps you" That sound good?' he grinned up at them.

**_Jokey:_ **   
**Never whip a thoroughbred**   
  
**_Ensemble:_ **   
**Angry pygmys shrunk his head**

'Cool costume' said Sky 'I wonder who's in there'

**Why did it take death to see**   
**Happiness was up to me?**

Miss Argentina sighed again, remembering the moment that she'd realised that. 

**_All:_ **   
**If I knew then**   
**What I know now**   
**I would've laughed and danced**   
**And lanced every sacred cow**   
**I thought I knew**   
**But I was wrong**   
**'Cause life is short**   
**But death is super long**

'How long have you been dead?' asked Barbara kindly, looking at the ghost/zombie 

'A long time' said Miss Argentina 'Too long, how about you?'

'Umm, a year is it?' asked Barbara, looking at her husband, who shrugged 

'Why didn't you guys come to the Netherworld?' asked Miss Argentina. The Maitlands both pointed to Beetlejuice, who waved at Miss Argentina. 'Of course' said Miss Argentina 

**_Fire Work Dude:_ **   
**I exploded!**

'DANCE BREAK!' said Beetlejuice, he lifted his hands and pointed them at Lydia, looking like he was going to posses her, but Barbara looked sternly at the demon 

'Beej, we talked about possessing people' she said in a motherly tone 

'Sorry Babs' said Beetlejuice, crawling back into the tent. Miss Argentina was looking at Barbara in a strange way

'You can control him?' she asked in disbelief 'How did you manage that?'

'Oh, it took awhile, but he's learned' said Barbara 'also, we rewarded him, so he was more likely to listen to us'

**_Miss Argentina (ensemble):_ **   
**If I knew then (If I knew)**   
**What I know now**

'Miss A, you should do this' said Beetlejuice, sticking his head out of the tent 'It'd be really cool for everyone who dies to get a dance number, also it'd give all the ghosts something to do'

'Maybe I will' said Miss Argentina, smiling at the suggestion 'Thanks Beetlejuice'

**_All:_ **   
**I would've crossed every line**   
**And drank all the wine**   
**Before my final bow**

'I wish I'd had this when I died' said Emily 'Its a lot cooler than just "hi, your dead, enjoy the after life!"' Lydia snorted and started laughing into Emily's shoulder. Charles looked at Delia in surprise. They hadn't been able to get Lydia to laugh like that, at a small comment, in a long time. Having Emily around really changed Lydia, and they dreaded when she had to go again, fearing that Lydia would slip into a state of depression again

**Miss Argentina (ensemble):**   
**If I knew (If I knew)**   
  
**_All:_ **   
**The things that now I know**   
**I would ride the highs and cherish the lows**   
**Going, it's a quick trick 'round the rodeo**

'I'm gonna leave after this song' said Miss Argentina 'and get all the ghost in on this, I think we have a couple of dead dance teachers, who are still young'

**_Miss Argentina:_ **   
**So before they lower the curtain, be certain to enjoy the show**   
**That's what I know!**   
  
**_Ensemble:_ **   
**Life is short but death is long**   
**Here, one minute then it's gone**   
**Thought I knew but I was wrong**   
**If I only knew what I know now!**

'Who's the head of the Netherworld?' asked Lydia 'Junos gone, so is it Beej?'

'No, I gave that title to Miss A' said Beetlejuice 'Leadership isn't really my thing, and I prefer spending time with you anyway scarecrow'

'Emily, once you come back to the Netherworld, please come to my office, I want to discuss something with you' said Miss Argentina, standing up. 'This was very enjoyable, I'm gonna go train some ghosts, goodbye everyone' she strutted out the door and Lydia smiled sadly, wrapping her arms tightly around Emily 

'I don't want you to go again' she whispered 

'I don't want to either Lydsie' said Emily, rocking her daughter back and fourth 'But you've got a pretty amazing family anyway, and I'm always with you... in here' she placed her cold hand over Lydia's chest. 


	23. Home

'So, this song is called Home?' asked Emily, looking over at Charles, who nodded 

'I think I know what this is about' said Lydia. She hoped that her family wouldn't judge her too much on what was said on this song, if it was accurate. 

**_Lydia:_  
Mama, I could use some help here**

'Ahh, another song to the good old dead mum' said Beetlejuice. Emily looked at everyone, very confused 

'There were some other songs where Lyds sang about you' explained Barbara 'There was this really sweet song called Dead Mom'

'Is that just how I'm known now Lydsie?' asked Emily. Lydia nodded and Emily hugged her tight

**Tired of talking to myself here  
Back at home, you don't exist**

'Charles?' asked Emily, looking over at her ex-husband 

'You know I'm not good with feelings Em' said Charles. Emily nodded sadly and hugged Lydia tightly 

**So here I am in the abyss**   
**Are you really in this place?**   
**It's like the emptiness of space**   
**I could search for all eternity**   
**And never see your face**

'Lydsie, I'm sorry to break it to you, but you'd probably never find me in the Netherworld' said Emily, lifting her daughters head up. Lydia nodded sadly and smiled a little

'I know, I tried' she laughed a little 'I've just realised that, me and dad have been to the Netherworld and you two haven't' she pointed to the Maitlands 'Isn't that kinda funny, 'cause you two are dead, and should've gone'

'Well, Lydia, if this is you telling us that you don't want us with you anymore, we can go you know' said Barbara 'Ya know, go hang out with your mum, have a fun time, leave you all alone''

'No!' said Lydia frantically shaking her head 'Please no, don't go. I was joking'

'I know you were sweetie' said Barbara, smiling at the teenager. Lydia shook her head and frowned at Barbara

'Not funny' mumbled Lydia, making Barbara and Emily laugh

**Help me out**   
**I'm lost without you**   
  
**Standing**   
**Stuck on this impossible road**   
**No idea which way to go**   
**Whichever path I choose**   
**I lose, you know**   
**And I don't know which way's home**   
**Oohhh**   
**I don't know which way's home**   
**Ooohhhh**

Emily hugged Lydia tightly, a feeling of guilt washing over her again as she realised it was her fault her daughter felt like that. No, it wasn't her fault she died, it was the cancers fault. Then, she realised her happy Lydia was now. She seemed so happy living with the Maitlands, her father, Delia and Beetlejuice. Sky also seemed like an extremely nice girl. Emily looked over at Delia and Charles and smiled. Charles had his arm wrapped around Delia and was resting his head on her shoulder. She makes him happy, she thought, thats all that matters. Emily was pulled out of her thoughts by Lydia shifting so she had her head in her mothers lap and her legs by the Maitlands. Emily shook her head at her daughter, glancing at the Maitlands to see if they were ok with that, and saw the ghost couple laughing.

**You always saw life as a game**   
**But since you left, it sucks to play**   
**I'm beaten up and bruised**   
**Confused by rules that alter every day**   
**Where to next?**

After meeting Emily, and hearing that verse of the song, Delia wondered what Charles was like when Emily was alive. He had changed a lot from the sad man who'd brought his daughter to her for life coaching, however seeing him interact with Emily today gave her an insight into what he might've been like back then. He seemed more relaxed than she'd seen him the whole time they'd been watching the musical. Delia leant closer to him and smiled when he put his head on her shoulder. Delia really liked Emily, she was really nice, didn't care that Charles had moved on, and she didn't hate Delia. Maybe, now that she knew Emily, Delia could help Lydia more when she felt sad. 

**You left but I'm still standing**   
**Spinning on this infinite road**   
**Terrified of letting you go**   
**No light above and there's no hope below**   
**And I don't know which way's home**   
**Mom, I've got my heart in my hand**   
**Speak to me and I'll understand**   
**One little word to know I'm not alone**   
**And show me the way back home**   
**Oohh**   
**Is there a way back home?**   
**Ooohhhh**

Barbara put her hands on Lydia's feet, and looked over at the teenager. Lydia was definitely the happiest she'd been for a long time, and she was actually acting like a regular teenager, laughing and goofing around. Lydia had changed a lot from the teenager Adam and Barbara had met nearly a year ago, but as soon as Emily came into the room, Lydia started acting very different. Barbara could only hope that this new, goofy Lydia stayed once her mother left. _Enjoy it while it lasts_ , thought Barbara.

**The nothingness ahead of me**   
**Is this the end you meant for me?**   
**Every living minute**   
**There's no home without you in it**   
**I'm falling**   
**Quit stalling**   
**Your daughter is calling your name**   
**I've burned all my bridges and games**

'Lydsie? Is this really how you felt?' asked Emily. Lydia nodded and Emily sighed sadly, brushing Lydia's hair out of her face. 

_**(spoken)** _   
**Mom?**   
**I don't wanna forget you**   
**I promise**   
**I'm never gonna forget you**

'That was a really sweet conversation' said Sky

'Thats actually sort of how our actual conversation was' said Charles

'Adam, Barbara, are you ok with Lydia's feet in your faces?' asked Emily, looking at the ghosts.

'Oh yeah, its fine' said Barbara 'Don't stress, we're fine with it'

'You two are too kind sometimes' said Charles, turning to look at Lydia and the Maitlands 'Lydia, please move your feet out of Barbara's face' Lydia sighed but moved her feet 'Thank you' 

_**(sung)** _   
**I'm gonna go back home**   
**Adam, Barbara, Delia and Dad**

'Oh my gosh' said Sky loudly 'I just figured something out'

'What is it?' asked Delia kindly

'You guys are the first 5 letters of the alphabet' said Sky, pointing to all the adults 'A: Adam, B: Barbara, C: Charles, D: Delia and E: Emily' 

'Thats so cool!' said Delia 

'Then theres the 2 Ls, Lydia and Lawrence' said Barbara. Beetlejuice groaned and hid his face

'Babs, we talked about this' said Beetlejuice

'Why? I think Lawrence is a nice name' said Adam, looking at the demon 

'Sounds good when you say it, sexy' said Beetlejuice. Adam blushed a deep red and Beetlejuice laughed, going back into his pillow fort. Barbara put a comforting arm around Adam and whispered something in his ear, which made him blush a little and kiss her. Lydia glanced at her mother, who was laughing. 

**It's messy but they're all that I have**   
**I'll make the best of being flesh and bone**

'Yeah, enjoy it while it lasts' said Adam 'Thats my only advice to you'

**Mama, I'm going home**   
**Yeah**   
**Mama, I'm going home**   
**Home**   
**I'm going home!**   
**Mama, I'm going home!**

'Wow, those notes at the end' said Delia 'This girl is a really good singer'

'She is' agreed Lydia 

'So, thats where you go when you die?' asked Sky, looking up at Emily and Lydia 'An infinite abyss of nothingness?' 

'Pretty much' said Emily 'Its pretty boring'

'Shall we move onto the next song?' asked Charles 'Its called Creepy Old Guy'

'Oh yes, this is gonna be good' said Beetlejuice


	24. Creepy Old Guy

_**Lydia:** _   
**Way back when I was just ten**   
**Simple and sweet**   
**Everywhere, fellas would stare**   
**Out on the street**

'Thats suck a pretty dress' said Emily 'I never thought I'd see you in red Lydsie'

'Neither did I' said Lydia honestly 'But this dress that she's wearing looks a lot prettier than mine did'

**And I felt used**   
**Kinda confused**   
**I would refuse to look in their eyes**   
**But now I really love creepy old guys**

Emily coughed loudly and looked down at her daughter. Lydia grinned sheepishly and inched away from her mother, not knowing how she'd react 

'Please tell me that you're joking and only messing with BJ' said Emily

'You'll have to wait and see' said Lydia

**_All:_  
We all do!**

'No one can resist me!' 

**_Barbara:_  
Gum disease**

'Babs, I don't have gum disease!' said Beetlejuice, looking at Barbara with hurt 'You would know, or ask Sexy, you've both kissed me' both of the Maitlands frowned at the demon 

**_Delia:_ **   
**Skin like grilled cheese**

'My skin is beautiful' said Beetlejuice, placing a hand under his chin and looking up at Delia 'Also, see Babs, NO GUM DISEASE!' he smiled at Barbara and showed her his teeth **  
**

'Eww, Beej, please close your mouth' said Barbara

**_Lydia:_  
Saggy old asses**

'I didn't know you liked my butt Lydia' said Beetlejuice. Lydia gagged

**_Delia:_  
Saggy old asses**

'Same with you Delia' Beetlejuice grinned at Delia, who's mouth was wide open 

'This is the one time you use my proper name?!'

**_Lydia:_  
Cute and vile  
  
 _Barbara and Delia:_  
Hey baby, smile**

'Say that, right now, you two, go!' said Beetlejuice, looking at the two females

'Hey baby, smile?' said Barbara and Delia, although it sounded more like a question and they used their normal voices

'Oh, come on' said Sky, looking out of the tent 'Do it properly' 

'Hey baby, smile' said Barbara and Delia, smiling at each other and mimicking the voices the actors used in the show

'YES!' said Sky and Beetlejuice, high fiving each other and grinning 

'I want to see more of this being acted out by you guys' said Emily 'Especially you singing, Barbara'

**_Lydia:_ **   
**To each girl that passes**   
***Delia wolf-whistles***

'This is such a weird sing' muttered Emily and Sky nodded in agreement, the two of them having no idea on what was going on

**_Barbara:_  
They make me blush**

'She just sounds so innocent and adorable' said Sky 'and her smile! IT'S BEAUTIFUL!'

'I think that everyone feels that way about Kerry Butler' said Barbara 

**_Delia:_  
Can't get enough**

'See, not even Darlia can resist this' said Beetlejuice, striking a ridiculous pose

'Beej, stop, just stop' advised Lydia

**_Lydia:_  
Now one of 'em loves me, wants to be mine**   
**  
** _**Barbara and Delia:** _ **  
That's right**   
**  
_Lydia:_  
Marrying my own creepy old guy!**   
**  
_Beetlejuice:_  
I'm a creepy old guy**

'He sounds so proud' said Emily, putting her hand to her heart 'Aww'

'Mum, please' said Lydia 

**_Lydia:_  
My creepy old guy, my creepy old guy**   
**I'm so happy I could cry**   
**  
** _**Barbara and Delia:** _ **  
Girls may seem disgusted, but we're actually just shy**

'Uhh... is that true?' asked Charles, looking at Delia, Emily, Barbara, Lydia and Sky 

'Well, its not entirely wrong' said Emily, Lydia and Delia nodded in agreement 

'But sometimes boys can be really gross' said Sky

'You have a point' said Barbara 

**_Lydia:_  
My creepy old groom   
  
_Barbara:_  
Creepy old groom  
  
 _Lydia and Barbara:_  
Play that wedding tune**

'There voices sound so good together' said Sky 'Its really satisfying' 

**_Lydia:_  
Hey folks, step aside**   
**  
_Beetlejuice (spoken):_  
I am older, but I'm glad I waited**

'Oh... eww' said Lydia, picking up a pillow and throwing it at the back of Beetlejuice's fort 'Creep'

'You agreed to it' said Beetlejuice, poking his head out of the fort and chucking the pillow back at Lydia

'Only to save Barb' said Lydia 

'Please stop arguing' said Delia 'You're friends now and thats all in the past, so theres no need to argue'

**_Lydia:_  
'Cause here comes the bride  
I am marrying my creepy old guy**   
**  
_Ensemble:_  
Creepy old guy, creepy old guy, creepy old guy**   
**  
_Lydia:_  
My creepy old guy**

'She's got a real good voice' said Charles

'Hey! Sexy possessed the skeletons' said Beetlejuice 'He did learn from the best'

**_Ensemble:_  
Creepy old guy, creepy old guy, creepy old guy!  
  
 _Lydia:_  
** **Fix his hair**   
**Get him prepared**   
**For Armageddon**

'Is his hair a wig?' asked Sky 'Cause if it is, then how will they change that at all?'

'Umm... I don't actually know, sorry Sky' said Adam 

**_Barbara:_  
Sure, the groom**   
**Crawled out of a tomb**

'Babs, I'm offended, I'm from hell, not a tomb' 

**_Delia:_  
But hey, hey, it's a wedding!**

'WOO HOO!' said Lydia 'That was amazing'

**_Lydia:_  
So dim the lights**   
**Pick up some rice**   
**Say something nice**   
**It's my day to shine  
I'm getting hitched to my creepy old guy  
  
 _Adam (spoken):  
_ Its showtime!**

'Sexy... why can't you actually do that to me?' whined Beetlejuice, lying on his stomach and looking up at Adam

'Beetlejuice, I am not smacking your butt' said Adam 

'Oh man... say my full name more often' said Beetlejuice, fanning himself. Adam rolled his eyes and hugged Barbara a little tighter

**_Lydia and Barbara:_ ** **  
Creepy old guy, creepy old guy**   
**She's marrying a creepy old guy**   
**  
_Charles:_  
Have you guys seen "Lolita"?**   
**This is just like that, but fine**

'What?' asked Sky 

'Lydia's look of confusion at Charles, is amazing' said Barbara 

'Its just like them' said Emily 

**_Ensemble:_  
Creepy old dude, creepy old dude**   
**Our faith has been renewed**   
**Now love is alive!**

**_Lydia:_  
Wave your baby girl goodbye**   
**I am walking down the aisle**   
**I wanna see a tear in every eye as I pass by**   
**I know that on the outside he's disgusting**   
**And even on the inside, he's disgusting**

Lydia silently laughed and Beetlejuice frowned 

**But I know that this time, I'm makin' it right  
With my family by my side**

'Why are they actually like a real family?' asked Sky 'Like, the chemistry they all have is amazing'

**_Beetlejuice:_  
O.M.G.**   
**Dressed to a "T"**   
**Fancy and formal**   
**I found me a wife**   
**L'chaim!, to life**   
**This is so normal!**   
**I was ignored**   
**But now, I'm adored!**   
**'Cause I extorted, tortured, and lied**   
**Give it up for my underage bride!**

'Seriously Beej?' said Lydia, looking down at the demon, who grinned back at her

**_All:_  
Here comes the bride**   
**Here comes the bride**   
**God be glorified  
  
 _Literally everyone:_  
I can't believe some cultures think this kind of thing's alright**

'At least they pointed it out' said Barbara 'Because it's entirely true, I was very concerned when you said you would marry him'

'Wait, you could hear?' asked Lydia 'But you didn't say anything'

'I was in a bit too much pain to say anything' said Barbara 'Also, I was a little too distracted by the fact that I was being exorcised' 

**_Lydia:_  
My creepy old guy**   
**My creepy old guy**   
**Doesn't he deserve a chance at life?**

'Oh yeah! Thats right' said Beetlejuice, throwing his fist in the air and narrowly missing Sky's face 

'Beej, careful' said Adam, seeing Sky slowly backing away from the demon

**_Beetlejuice:_  
Oh yeah, that's right**

Everyone laughed a little at the similarity between the Beetlejuice on the screen and the real life (or death) Beetlejuice. 

**_Ensemble:_  
Yeah, that's right**   
**  
_Lydia:_  
Let's make him alive!**   
**I am marrying my creepy old guy!  
  
 _Ensemble:_  
Guy, guy, guy, creepy old guy**   
**Guy, guy, guy, creepy old guy**   
**Guy, guy, guy  
  
 _Beetlejuice (spoken):  
_ I have chills!  
  
 _All:_  
Yeah**

'That was the weirdest song yet' said Delia, after a few minutes of silence

'So, Lydia, you married Beetlejuice?' asked Emily, turning to look at Lydia, who backed a little further away 

'Only for about 2 minutes' said Lydia 'Then I killed him'

'What?' asked Emily and Sky 

'It was really weird' said Delia, Charles, Adam and Barbara nodding in agreement 

'Well, there is only one song left, shall we get it over and done with?' asked Charles. Lydia crawled over to Emily and hugged her tightly, not wanting her mother to leave just yet, but determined to make the most of her time with her. 


	25. Jump In The Line

**_Lydia:_  
Shake shake shake senora**   
**Shake your body line**   
**Shake shake shake senora**   
**Shake it all the time**

'Yes! I love this song!' said Emily, sitting up straighter and mouthing along to the words

**_Lydia, Barbara and Delia:_  
Work work work senora**   
**Work your body line**

'They look like such a happy family!' said Sky, she turned to the family sitting on the couches 'I want to see you guys act this out in real life'

'Umm... sure' said Lydia, surprising everyone 'What? Mum loves this song, and I wanna see Dad dance again' she smirked evilly at her father

**_Lydia, Barbara, Delia and Adam:_  
Work work work senora**   
**Work it all the time**

**_Charles:_  
My girls name is Senora**

'Finally Chuck!' said Beetlejuice 

'What?' asked Charles

'You finally sung in the musical' said Beetlejuice 

'I sung when Adam and Barb possessed us' said Charles 'I did in real life too'

'No, that was possession, this is real' said Beetlejuice

**_Barbara:_  
I tell you friends I adore her**

'You look like a real mother and daughter' said Emily, looking from Barbara to her daughter 'Its really sweet, I'm happy that Lydsie has parental figures in her life still'

'We'll always look out for her' said Barbara. Adam and Delia nodded in agreement 

**_Adam:_  
And when she dances, oh brother**

'Sorry, Adam, I have to say this' said Lydia, looking at the male ghost 'You dress like every awkward, goofy dad ever' Adam laughed 'I think its cute though, and the fact that you two died wearing matching outfits is adorable'

'We didn't usually match' said Barbara 'Definitely not'

**_Delia:_  
She's a hurricane in all kinds of weather**

'Wow, that dress is amazing' sighed Delia, looking at the dress her onstage self was wearing 'I wish I had a dress like that in real life'

'Hold on, when did they get changed?' asked Sky, looking closely at the characters on the screen. 'Adam's and Barbara's clothes changed to black and white, and Delia's dress changed, when did that happen?' 

'Uhh... during the dance break in the previous song' said Emily 

**_Barbara, Delia, Adam and Charles:_ ** **  
Jump in the line**   
**Rock your body in time**

'I'm forcing you guys to learn this dance' announced Beetlejuice 

**_Lydia:_  
Ok I believe you**   
**  
** **_Barbara, Delia, Adam and Charles:_ ** **  
Jump in line**   
**Rock your body in time**   
**  
** **Lydia:  
Ok I believe you** **  
Shake shake shake senora  
**   
**_Delia:  
_ Ohh**

'WHAT?' exclaimed Sky loudly when Lydia started floating 'THAT IS SO COOL!' she looked at the Maitlands 'Can you actually do that?'

'Yup' said Adam proudly

'Can you do it to me?' asked Sky, bouncing up and down 

'Once the song finishes' said Barbara. Sky nodded and continued grinning excitedly 

**_Ensemble:_ **   
**Shake your body line**   
**  
_Lydia:_  
Work work work senora**   
**  
_Delia:  
_ Ahh**

'WOAH' said Beetlejuice 'She can sing'

'Wanna try that Delia?' asked Lydia, smirking at her step-mother

'If I tried, I'd sound like a dying cat, so no thank you' said Delia 'I'll leave it to the proffesionals'

**_Ensemble:_  
Work it all the time**   
**  
_Lydia (ensemble):_  
Mama if you're listening  
Doesn't this blow your mind**

'Honestly, your family does blow my mind' said Emily 'Its so unique, and unusual, and I love it' 

'I love our Strange and Unusual family' said Lydia

**(Shake shake shake shake Senora)  
** **(Shake shake shake shake Senora)**   
**I was on a mission**   
**This is what I left behind**

'What mission?' asked Beetlejuice 

'You're an idiot' muttered Lydia 

'Be nice Lydia' said Barbara 

'Sorry Beej' muttered Lydia 'But my mission was trying to find my dead mum'

'Oh... duh' said Beetlejuice, hitting his head 'Sorry'

**(Shake shake shake shake Senora)  
** **(Shake shake shake shake Senora)**   
**I'll miss you everyday  
Seek a little strange and usual**   
**And you will find**

'I'm glad you've stopped completely obsessing over death' said Delia, smiling at her step-daughter 'I am actually proud of you Lydia, you've changed and grown a lot as a person in the last few months, and its amazing to see the person you're becoming' 

**(Shake shake shake shake Senora)** **  
Life, beyond all comprehension**

'And a little bit of death' Beetlejuice whispered to Sky, who laughed

**(Shake shake shake shake Senora)**   
**A mess in multipul dimensions**   
**A little unconventional  
I know**

'I think its the best family in the world' said Emily 'I wish I'd lived with ghosts'

**(Shake, Shake)**   
**But mama I'm home  
(Daylight come and me wanna go home)  
** **(Daylight come and me wanna go home)**   
**I'm home  
** **(Daylight come and me wanna go home)**   
**  
_Ensemble:_  
Shake shake shake senora**   
**  
_Lydia:_  
I'm home**

Sky and Beetlejuice burst into applause, and everyone soon joined in. Emily was so happy that her daughter and husband had found such a kind a kind, loving and accepting family, even if it consisted of 2 ghosts, a demon and a life coach. She squeezed Lydia tightly and kissed her head. 

'Guys, can you make me float?' asked Sky, looking at the Maitlands. They nodded and the young girl scrambled to her feet. She ran over to behind the couch and the Maitlands stood either side of her. And, just like in the musical, they possessed her and made her fly through the air. The look of pure joy and excitement on Sky's face was making everyone smile. Slowly the Maitlands lowered her to the ground again and Sky ran to hug Barbara 'Thank you so much! That was awesome'

'You're welcome Sky' said Barbara, hugging her back. Lydia stood up and came over with Beetlejuice 

'Wanna go flying together?' she asked, offering Sky her hand. Sky nodded and the two held each others hands. Adam and Barbara lifted the pair off the ground, and Beetlejuice floated up next to them. Lydia, Sky and Beetlejuice started laughing and playing hand clapping games in mid air, having the time of their lives (death in BJ's case)

'Is this how everyday is for you?' asked Emily, turning to look at Charles and Delia 

'What? Beej and Lydia doing stupid stuff and floating in the air?' asked Charles 'Yeah, pretty much'

'I love it' said Emily. The 3 adults watched as the Maitlands lowered the trio to the ground again, and watched Sky tackle Barbara in a hug again. They all started talking again and the door opened

'Well, congratulations' said Amelia, walking into the room 'You finished Beetlejuice: The Musical!'


	26. What Comes Next?

'Well... I have some options for you guys' said Amelia, clapping her hands together and looking around the room 'I could just send you guys all straight back home, or I could show you guys some songs that were cut before the show made it to Broadway, just like the Children We Didn't Have song. So, whatcha wanna do?'

'No offence' said Sky, standing up 'But I kinda wanna get back home, is that ok Amelia?' 

'Of course Sky' said Amelia, she gestured for the young girl to say goodbye to everyone. Sky quickly hugged Barbara again, before waving to everyone else and walking over to Amelia. 'Ok, you guys do whatever you want while I send her back, then we'll make a choice' Amelia left the room with Sky following her, after waving a final goodbye to everyone

'I want to listen to the cut songs' said Lydia immediately 

'Same, the one we listened to was good' said Barbara 

'Think we scared Sky?' asked Adam

'What?' asked Charles and Delia, looking at the ghost 

'She wanted to leave, do you think we scared her?' asked Adam

'No, you guys are just a really close, tight-knit family' said Emily 'She probably felt as though she was intruding on something'

'Oh' said Adam 'Is that ok?'

'Totally' said Emily 'I think its really sweet, and I'm so happy that you guys are all so close'

'I don't want you to go' said Lydia, hugging Emily tightly 'Do you have to go again after this?' 

'I'm afraid so Lydia' said Emily 'But I promise that you'll be just fine without me'

'No' said Lydia, shaking her head and feeling tears welling in her eyes 

'Lydsie, please, listen to me' said Emily 'You have an amazing family, and you are just fine without me. If, when I go, you start acting all sad again, I'll just go now, but I'll stay if you promise to be normal, and not mourn me any more, ok?' she stroked her daughters cheek

'But...' Lydia started to protest but stopped when she saw the look on her mothers face 'Ok'

'Good girl' said Emily. She kissed Lydia's forehead and moved to go sit with Charles and Delia 

'What? Where are you going?' asked Lydia

'Getting to know Delia' said Emily 'You've still got Adam and Barbara, and Beej' she smiled and turned to Delia. Lydia sighed and looked at the Maitlands sadly. She just couldn't understand why they got to stay as ghosts but not her mum. It sort of made her angry, but she pushed that feeling away, knowing that she shouldn't get mad at them with 3 of her 5 parents watching.

'Need a hug?' asked Barbara. Lydia shook her head and looked around the room 'Well, offers always there' said Barbara

'Thanks Babs' said Beetlejuice, jumping onto the Maitlands and hugging them tightly. For once, the ghost couple didn't protest and just hugged the demon back 'This is nice' commented Beetlejuice 'We should do this more often' 

'Sure Beej' said Barbara

'Really?' asked Beetlejuice, pulling away and sitting up 'Like for real?'

'Definitely' said Adam

'Thanks Sexy' said Beetlejuice, hugging both of the Maitlands again 'You guys are the best' he paused for a few moments before adding 'I like hugs' quietly, so only the 2 ghosts heard. They smiled at each other and hugged the demon extra tightly. 

'So... we made a decision?' asked Amelia, walking into the room 

'We'd like to listen to the cut songs' said Delia 

'Sweet, I'll get that set up' said Amelia 'make yourselves comfy, first song is Mamma Would' 


	27. Mama Would

_**Lydia:** _   
**Mom would take her foot off the gas on the way back home**   
**On the way back home from school**   
**Slip into neutral on top of the hill and away we'd roll**   
**No breaking 'cause breaking was breaking the rules**

'God, I miss that' said Lydia 'I wish you'd do that dad'

'No thanks Lydia' said Charles 

**_Adam:_  
I used to do that on my bike  
It was terrifying**

'I used to do that too' said Barbara 'But then one day I fell off and hurt myself... I've been terrified to go fast on a bike since then' Lydia sighed at Barbara. _This is her problem_ , thought Lydia, _she's too terrified of the past to live in the present and it held her back from doing so much stuff_. But Lydia didn't tell Barbara this, she just hugged a pillow close to her chest and didn't look at the ghost, still a little annoyed at the Maitlands

**_Lydia:_  
Mama could role play like nobody else**   
**Pretend we were birds and make nests in the house**   
**One time she spat chewed up food in my mouth**   
**She was free, she was everything a mother should be**   
**When nobody else believed in me, mama would**   
  
**_Adam:_   
I'm sorry did you say she spat in your mouth?**

'Oh... that was so fun' said Emily 'I miss having you as my baby girl'

'I miss having you as my mum' said Lydia 

'You guys should've seen her as a baby' said Emily, looking at Delia and the Maitlands 'She was the cutest blonde curly haired baby, and she would always dress up in funny outfits and put on shows for us' she looked at Charles 'Do you still have the videos?'

'Of course, they're in my office, I watch them when I feel stressed' said Charles 'Seeing my little girl makes me happy'

'Can you show us them when we get home?' asked Barbara, gesturing to herself, Adam and Delia 

'No' said Lydia firmly

'Yes' said Charles, avoiding his daughters stare and looking back at the screen 

**_Lydia:_   
Yeah cause we were birds!  
  
 _Adam:_   
Oh yeah, that makes sense**   
**  
_Lydia:_  
Mama would never accept things just the way they were  
Mama would always seek so much more  
Like the way she'd say "We're being chased by a murderer!"  
As she fumbled for the keys to the door**

'I hated it when you did that Em' muttered Charles 

'I thought it was funny' laughed Lydia. 

**Mama was serious about Halloween  
Her costumes could make hardened criminals scream   
The dads in our neighbourhood still have bad dreams  
She was wild  
She knew just what to say to a child  
If I ever needed to see her smile  
Mama would**

'When you died Paul came over one day and said that he'd never forget you because of your clown costume that year' said Charles, looking at his ex/dead wife, who laughed 

'That was such a cool costume' said Lydia 

**No matter how awkward or hard, mama would ask  
Mama would never presume  
When others would hide or pretend  
Mom would make friends with the elephants in the room  
  
She'd want us to talk about her  
Why doesn't he talk about her?**

Lydia looked down, not exactly wanting to have this discussion with her father again, but luckily, he didn't try to talk to her. 

**I know, sure as hell, that if the shoe was on the other foot  
That mama would  
** **  
** **Daddy was never always this imperious  
** **Mama would actually make him laugh  
She'd say "Charles, life's too important to be serious"  
Then she'd throw his phone in the trash**

'Oh, I wish you'd come back and do that sometimes' said Delia, looking at Emily 

'He hasn't changed then' said Emily and Delia shook her head 'Well, just take his phone away and hide it from him, force him to play a board game or something' Charles looked at Emily as if to say _Really?_ But Emily just laughed

'Thanks for the advice, I'll use it' said Delia, glancing at her husband

**Mama was positive, mama was pure  
Making this darkened dad less insecure  
No matter how rough the path mom would endure  
She was fun, she was bright and as warm as the sun**

'Emily, can I just say that you seemed like the best mother' said Barbara, turning to look at the ghost 'I never got to be a mother, but if I did, I would've hoped that I was exactly like you. Because you and Charles raised a beautiful, kind, caring and excepting daughter and if we'd ever had a daughter, I'd want her to be just like Lydia' 

'Aww, Barbara, thank you' Emily put a hand on her chest and smiled at the ghost couple 'You guys are actually the sweetest people I've ever met, dead or alive. You seem so excepting and kind and the way that you treat Lydia is amazing. It just makes me happy knowing that Lydsie has a proper family again' 

Lydia completely forgot her anger and annoyance at the Maitlands, and threw herself at them in a hug. They were surprised for a second, but hugged the teenager back. Lydia settled back down in Barbara's arms and closed her eyes as Barbara started stroking her hair

**Now that I'm seeing you spirit to spirit  
What if I left home but mama's still in it?  
I've got to find her and you are the sign that I should**

'I promise you, that I went straight to the Netherworld' said Emily

**Oh, 'cause mama would  
Mama would  
Mama would**

'That was such a good song' said Delia 'Why'd they cut it?'

'I don't know' said Charles, 'I think it gives so much more information on Emily that we didn't originally get in the musical'

'Thats so true' said Adam 'In the musical she's just portrayed as Lydias "dead mom" but there's so much more' then he glanced down at the females on his lap 'uhh, guys... I'm trapped'

'What?' asked Delia, she looked at him and laughed 'This is too good' Lydia and Barbara had both fallen asleep, with their arms around each other. 'Want me to move them?'

'No its fine' said Adam. He looked around the room and realised something was off... and that it was too quiet 'Hey, guys, where'd Beej go?'


	28. Dead Mom (reprise)

'BJ?' asked Delia, and Adam nodded 'No, is he not here?'

'If he is, this is the quietest he's ever been in his life/death' said Adam 

'True' said Delia, she got up and looked in the pillow fort 'Yeah, its empty... where'd that demon go?'

'BOO!' shouted Beetlejuice, appearing behind Delia in a cloud of green smoke. Delia screamed and turned around, only to see Beetlejuice and scream again, running to the back of the room. Beetlejuice fell to the ground and started rolling around laughing. The demon had appeared back in the room, dressed in a unicorn onesie. It'd certainly given the life coach the fright of her life, and she was standing in the far corner of the room, breathing heavily

'Whats goin on?' Lydia sleepily asked, opening her eyes and looking around 'Beej? Why're you dressed as a unicorn?'

'Oh, I just scared Diana' grinned Beetlejuice, wiping his eyes and sitting up 

'Apologise' mumbled Barbara, not opening her eyes

'But Babs-' started Beetlejuice 

'Now Beej' said Barbara, opening one of her eyes and looking at the demon 'With her real name'

'Sorry Delia' said Beetlejuice, snapping his fingers making the onesie turn to his classic striped suit. 

'Its alright Beej, I forgive you' said Delia, moving back to the couch and sitting next to Emily

'Whats next? asked Emily 

'Nap time' mumbled Lydia, lying back down and hugging Barbara, who'd already gone back to sleep

'More cut songs' said Charles, smiling slightly at his sleeping daughter 

'I wonder what this one is' said Emily, looking at the screen with interest. Adam gently shook Barbara and Lydia awake, not wanting them to miss anything else. The two females were very grumpy to be woken up, but stayed awake and looked at the screen. 

_**Lydia:** _   
**Mom, it's me, your daughter**   
**Calling to you from afar**

'Ahh, another song about the _dead mum_ ' said Beetlejuice, sitting on the arm of the couch next to Adam 'How many of these are there?'

'Who knows' said Adam 'Lydia really misses her "dead mum" so...' he shrugged 

'Well, if they made a song for every-time I thought about mum, they'd have 50 musicals at least, probably more' said Lydia, she looked over at Emily 'I really miss you mum, we both do'

'I miss you guys too' said Emily 'More than you'll ever know' 

**A fish stuck out of waters**   
**Reaching out across the stars**

'Oh, is this a reprise of the... _dead mom_... song?' asked Charles 

'Dead mum?' asked Emily 'What was that like?'

'I would offer to sing it to you, but it'd probably kill you again' said Lydia, laughing slightly 

'I'm sure you have a beautiful singing voice Lydia' said Barbara 

'Hey...' said Lydia, turning her head slowly 'you can sing it for us, I wanna hear you sing'

'I don't remember it' said Barbara 'Well, sort of the end but not really...' she trailed off 

'Think, and sing for us at the end' said Lydia, patting Barbara on the shoulder

**Buried in these pages**   
**There's a way into your arms**

'Handbook for the recently deceased?' guessed Beetlejuice 

'Never reading anything from that book aloud ever again' said Lydia 

'What happened?' asked Emily 

'I nearly exorcised Barb' said Lydia. Emily looked at her daughter in shock, and then at Barbara with a questioning look. Barbara just nodded sadly in response 

'I forgave Lydia a long time ago for that' said Barbara, putting an arm around Lydia and squeezing her tightly

**Open up, let's take a ride**   
**To see you on the other side**   
**All the pain will fade and we'll be one**   
  
_**(spoken)** _   
**Oh, come on**

'That was so good' said Emily 'I really wish I could hear the dead mum song, even if the name is a little weird'

'Barb?' asked Lydia, looking at the ghost, who sighed

'I guess I could try to sing the end of it' said Barbara 'But I'm warning you, I haven't sung for at least 2 years'

'Thats fine' said Lydia 'Just sing, please?' Barbara took a deep breath and her sweet voice filled the room 

_"Take me where my soul can run or I'll be in my bedroom  
Wake me when I'm twenty one  
Daddy's moving forward  
Daddy didn't lose a mom_ _  
_ _Mama won't you send a sign?  
I'm running out of hope and time  
A plague of mice, a lightning strike  
Or drop a nuclear bomb_ _  
_ _No more playing daddy's game_  
 _I'll go insane if things don't change_  
 _Whatever it takes to make him say your name_  
 _Dead mom"_  
  
'Wow' said Lydia, looking at Barbara 'You sound exactly like the person who plays you in this'

'Lydia, that is the nicest compliment someone has ever given me' said Barbara 'Being told I sound like Kerry Butler is literally the best, thank you' she hugged Lydia tightly 

'Babs, I didn't know you could sing that well' said Beetlejuice 'Like, everyone said you could sing, and I thought you'd, like, be average, but you're really good'

'Thanks Beej' said Barbara, smiling shyly at the demon 

'Thats my wife everyone!' said Adam loudly, throwing his arms around Barbara and kissing her cheek. Barbara kissed him and looked at Emily 

'So, thats just the end, but what do you think?' she asked 'Of course, I sound very different to the person who actually sings it, but it gives you an idea'

'Sounds like an amazing song, and you have an incredible voice' said Emily

'So, we all agree Barbara can sing, right' said Delia, and everyone nodded in agreement 'Right, so when we get home, Barb, your singing more for us'

'Uhh... ok?' said Barbara

'Good' said Delia 'Shall we move on?'

'Sure thing Donna' said Beetlejuice 

'How...?' asked Charles, looking at Beetlejuice 'How did you get Donna from Delia? Is it just any name that starts with D now?'

'Correct Chucky boy' said Beetlejuice, doing finger guns at him and settling down infront of the couch, near Adam. 


	29. Running Away

**_Lydia:_  
Mama, I could use some wisdom  
Gotta make a big decision  
Go back where you don't exist  
Or onwards into the abyss**

'Is this a different version of Home?' asked Lydia

'Probably... yeah' said Emily 'sounds like it'

**I risked so much to come this far  
Behind the dark inside the stars  
Now there's a line to cross, a heavy cost  
From here to where you are**

'You did a lot to make it to the Netherworld Lyds' said Barbara 'I'll give you that'

'She's always been stubborn' said Charles 'Even when she was a tiny baby'

'You could've told me that when I started life-coaching her' said Delia, looking at her husband 'Because it was impossible getting her to talk'

**Help me out  
I'm lost without you standing  
Stuck on this impossible road  
No idea which way to go  
Whichever path I choose I lose, you know  
And I don't know which way's home**

'Oh...' said Lydia 'I see what they did, they took elements and lines from this song and put it into the final version, thats smart'

'Its interesting to see how the song has developed' said Delia

**Daddy ran away from his pain  
Do you think I'm doing the same?  
You won't believe what I'm about to say  
But maybe I'm running away, oh  
Have I been running away? Oh**

'You two are both too stubborn' sighed Emily, shaking her head 

'They are' agreed Delia 

**You always saw life as a game  
But since you left it sucks to play  
I'm beaten up and bruised  
Confused by rules that alter every day**

'I've heard that before' mumbled Beetlejuice, he looked up at Adam and Barbara 'Where have I heard that before?'

'You're serious?' asked Lydia, looking at the demon who was deep in thought 

'It's from the song Home, that we heard a while ago' said Barbara kindly 

'Oh, yeah' said Beetlejuice, blushing slightly and looking down, embarrassed 'duh'

'It's alright Beej' said Adam, he put a hand on the demons shoulder and squeezed it comfortingly, making him smile slightly 

**I've been through things you won't believe  
Invisible inside my dream  
I had to drag my dad through hell and back  
But finally, he sees  
** **Where to next?  
You left but I'm still standing**

'You did drag me through hell' said Charles 'Ha, I can tell everyone I've been to hell and back'

'Man, I was born in hell' said Beetlejuice 

'That explains a lot' mumbled Lydia 

'Oi, shut up' said Beetlejuice 

'Stop fighting' said Barbara, stopping the fight

**Scared I'll never see you again  
Amazed we're finally saying your name  
Can you believe how far your daughter came?**

'I am so proud of you Lydia' said Emily 'Please never forget that' Lydia nodded and smiled at her mother. Hearing her mum say that was everything she needed to know that she was still appreciated and needed in life

**But this is the wrong damn way  
Ma, I got my heart in my hand  
Maybe this was part of your plan  
To show my daddy I will be okay  
And maybe I'm just running away, oh  
Am I just running away? Oh**

'I don't blame you for running away from your feelings' said Barbara 'either of you'

**Nothingness in front of us  
Is not what she would want for us**

'You are correct, my loves' said Emily 

**_Charles and Lydia:_  
We'll raise her up  
I'll never stop saying her name  
Again and again and again  
**

'Wow, these 2 needed to sing more together' said Delia 'Also, you deserved your own song Charles'

'Its not really like me' said Charles 'I'm not exactly a singing type'

'So they made your character pretty accurate then?' said Adam and Charles nodded

**_Lydia (spoken):_  
Let's go home.**

**_Charles (spoken):_  
That demon with the stupid hair, he's waiting for us. What are we gonna do?**

'Chuck, my hair is beautiful' said Beetlejuice 

'It's a mood-ring' said Lydia 'We can all tell how you feel' 

'Shut up' said Beetlejuice, his hair turning purple

'Aw, Lydia, you made him sad' said Barbara, she leant over Adam and ran her fingers through the demons hair. Beetlejuice immediately relaxed 

'Babs, don't stop' mumbled Beetlejuice, closing his eyes and smiling. Barbara laughed and kept running her hand through the demons hair, leaning against Adam

**_Lydia (spoken):  
_ ** **Well, he's a con man. And the way to con a con man is... you give him what he wants.**

**_Charles (spoken):_ ** **  
You mean marry him? But you'll be-  
**

**_Lydia (spoken):  
_ ** **-bound to him for a lifetime. Yeah. One lifetime.**

**_Charles (spoken):_ ** **  
Oh... Ohhh!  
**

**_Lydia (spoken):  
_ ** **He thinks he's the ghost with the most? Let's make him think he's right.  
Dad... Promise we can talk about her?**

**_Charles (spoken):_ ** **  
Anytime you want**

'Pretty much how our conversation went down' said Charles 

'I'm glad you changed your mind' said Emily 'It seems to have made Lydsie a lot happier'

**_Lydia:_  
I'm gonna go back home!  
Mama, I'm letting go  
Screaming yes, into a world unknown  
I'm tired of running away  
I was the invisible girl  
But now I see myself in the world  
I know you understand why I can't stay  
Momma no more running away, yeah!  
Momma no more running away, no  
I'm gonna go back home!  
Mom, no more running away!**

'This song was good, but I like Home more' said Delia

'I agree, I just wish that Charles and Lydia got to sing together more' said Emily 'It was so sweet'

'Are you saying that because we were singing about you mum?' asked Lydia, looking at her mother with a smirk

'What? No' said Emily 'Its just sweet hearing a father and daughter sing'

'Sure, keep believing that mum' said Lydia. Emily frowned playfully at her daughter and Lydia laughed 'I love you mummy' she said sweetly

'Love you too baby' said Emily, blowing Lydia a kiss

'Guys' the door swung open and Amelia poked her head inside 'I got some bad news' 


	30. Saying goodbye

'I'm sorry, but we're gonna have to cut this viewing short' said Amelia sadly 

'Oh, whats up?' asked Delia

'My parents have come back early from their holiday, and they'll freak if they see you guys in this room' she sadly looked around the room 'I just wanted to say that meeting you guys is a dream come true. I've never got to see the musical when it was on Broadway, and its made me really sad, but this made it all a little better'

'Aww, Amelia, it was awesome meeting you, and seeing a musical about ourselves is amazing' said Barbara, getting up and hugging Amelia tightly 'So thank you for this'

'Thank you for not freaking out' laughed Amelia, hugging Barbara 'You're honestly kinder and sweeter than I could ever imagine'

'Aww, honey' said Barbara, hugging her tighter. Slowly, Amelia made her way around the room to everyone and said goodbye, then she left them to have 5 minutes to say goodbye to Emily. Lydia clung onto Emily and refused to let go

'It was so nice meeting all of you' said Emily, looking around the room at everyone 

'It was lovely to meet you too' said Delia, smiling at Emily 

'Just remember to take Charlies phone when he starts being too serious or is working too much, and force him to play a game' said Emily, looking at Delia. She gently unhooked Lydia's arms from around her and hugged Delia. Lydia stood sulkily by the Maitlands, who each put a hand on her shoulder, attempting to comfort the teenager

'I'm miss you so much' said Charles, pulling Emily into a tight hug 'It's gonna be hard to say goodbye again' 

'You'll be ok' said Emily 'You've got a great family, and a beautiful fiance or wife- wait' she pulled away from the hug and looked at Charles and Delia 'are you two married?'

'We got married a month ago' said Charles 

'Congratulations!' said Emily, pulling the two of them into a tight hug 'I'm so happy for both of you, you're so good together'

'Thanks Em' said Charles, hugging her again before letting her talk to the Maitlands. Adam put his hands on Lydia's shoulders and kept her near him while Barbara and Emily talked 

'Hey, my ghost gal!' Emily and Barbara high-fived before bursting into a fit of giggles and hugging each other 'I'm gonna miss you so much, even though we only met today'

'Same' said Barbara 'It was so nice getting to meet you though, I never thought I'd get to meet Lydia's mum, so this was a real treat'

'I never thought Lydsie would move in with real ghosts' laughed Emily and she hugged Barbara again 'Hopefully I'll see you one day in the future'

'C'mere Lyd' said Barbara, gesturing for Lydia to move away from Adam, Lydia walked over to Barbara and leant against her, still frowning. 

'Thank you so much for looking after Lydia' said Emily, embracing Adam 'I really appreciate it'

'No problem Emily, we love her' said Adam, hugging Emily quickly before letting her say goodbye to Beetlejuice and Lydia

'Beej, will you come visit me in the Netherworld?' asked Emily, looking at the demon 

'Of course' said Beetlejuice, he and Emily quickly high-fived and Emily turned to look at her daughter, who had tears welling up in her eyes. Lydia ran and hugged Emily tightly, crying into her mothers shoulder. Emily rubbed Lydia's back and laid her head on-top of Lydia's. Eventually, Lydia pulled away and looked at her mother

'Do you have to go?' sniffed Lydia, wiping at her eyes with her sleeve

'I'm afraid so' said Emily, reaching out and gently brushing a piece of Lydia's hair out of her face 

'I don't ever want to be without you again' said Lydia 

'I don't want to leave you either Lydia, but remember I'm always with you' said Emily, placing her hand on-top of Lydia's chest 'In here'

'B-but its so unfair' said Lydia, crying again 'I don't wanna lose you again'

'Lydsie, I know this may be hard, but I promise that you'll be fine' Lydia shook her head and Emily sighed 'You have an amazing family. Delia and your father and looking after you and raising you properly. The Maitlands love you with all their hearts and would die, again, for you. You and Beej seem like absolute chaos, you are perfect with each other and seem to have so much fun. Do you really want to leave all this behind?' 

'N-no' sniffed Lydia, smiling slightly 'I don't'

'Good girl' said Emily 'You're my brave girl and I'm so proud of you, and maybe sometime, we'll meet again, but I hope its not for many years. You deserve a long happy life, and Beej will keep me updated on you'

'I love you so much mummy' said Lydia, hugging her mother tightly again 'to the moon and back'

'I love you two cupcake' said Emily, using Lydia's childhood nickname and she and her father had given her

'You guys haven't used that forever' giggled Lydia, looking between her parents 'I've forgotten how much I like it'

'Maybe your father will start using it again' said Emily, she kissed Lydia on the cheek and squeezed her tightly, only letting go when Amelia entered the room again 

'Sorry guys' she said 'But I gotta take Emily'

'NO!' sobbed Lydia, completely loosing her cool and clinging onto her mother for dear life 'No, please, no, not again' 

'Come on Lydia' said Charles, he and Beetlejuice moving forward but Lydia shook her head

'NO!' she screamed 'Never again. I'm not leaving her ever again'

'Lydia' Barbara approached the teenager and bent down so she was eye level with Lydia 'Sweetheart, you have got to let go'

'No' said Lydia quietly 'no... no...'

'Please Lydia' said Barbara 'You have to be brave'

'No...' Lydia hugged her mother tightly 

'Come on Lydsie' said Emily, she unhooked her daughters arms and looked at Barbara 'You want her?'

'Come here Lydia' said Barbara, she held Lydia tightly and led her over to Adam

'Goodbye baby girl' said Emily, kissing Lydia lightly on the nose and walking over to Amelia. She looked around the room at everyone. Lydia was crying her eyes out, but gave her mother a small smile goodbye. Barbara and Adam waved goodbye to her, and smiled. Delia and Charles had their arms around each other and smiled at her. Beetlejuice blew her a kiss and Emily giggled 'Bye' 

As soon as Amelia led her out of the room, Lydia collapsed against Adam and started bawling her eyes out. Adam gently lifted Lydia into his arms and let her cry into his shoulder. Charles was looking down sadly and Delia whispered something in his ear. He nodded and Delia wrapped her arms around him. He buried his face in her neck and Delia comfortingly rubbed his back. Barbara looked at Beetlejuice and the two of them shared a look that clearly said _"How are we gonna cheer the Deetz up?"_

'Hey guys, ready to go back?' asked Amelia, entering the room and seeing the sad family before her. 

'Yeah, we'll go back' said Barbara, she gently moved everyone in the room towards the doorway and they looked at Amelia. 

'Ok, as soon as you go out this door, you're gonna be transported back to your world, back to what you were doing when I summoned you here' said Amelia, she stepped aside and gestured for them to go through. Barbara smiled at her and led her family through the door. Just as she went through, Lydia lifted her head off Adam's shoulder and waved goodbye to Amelia. 


	31. Aftermath

**Sky:  
** Sky landed back on her bed, and was immediately jumped on by one of her puppies. She giggled as the small dog licked her face and soon, more of the puppies woke up and started licking her face too. Sky was laughing and rolling around, trying to escape the dogs, but was failing. None of the dogs had proper names and Sky knew exactly what she was going to name them. There were 6 puppies, 3 boys and 3 girls, and she decided to name them after the Beetlejuice musical cast. There were the 3 girls Kerry, Sophia and Leslie, and the three boys, Rob, Alex and Adam. 

'Mum!' she called, picking up Kerry and Alex, her two favourites and running downstairs with the rest of them running after her 'I named the puppies!'

**Beetlejuice:  
** Beetlejuice appeared on the roof of their neighbours house and laughed, rubbing his hands together. He could finally continue with his prank. He started to set up all the buckets of water and flour, but stopped when he looked over at the Deetz/Maitlands house. _Lydia needs me_ , he thought placing the buckets on the ground, _pranking can wait_. And with that, he teleported himself into his friends bedroom, hoping to get the girl to smile. 

**Charles and Delia:  
** The two of them appeared back in their house and Charles sighed, sitting down heavily on their bed. Delia sat next to Charles and put her arm around his shoulders

'Are you ok?' she asked

'I'll be fine' said Charles 'I just feel so bad for Lydia. She didn't scream like that when Emily died, it was just quiet sobbing. I've never heard her scream like that before, it was so gut-wrenching and heartfelt and I just wonder if she'll ever be ok'

'I'm sure she'll be fine' said Delia 'But it may take time. She just got her mother back, only to have her taken away from her again. She'll need time to get over it, but I hope that me, Adam and Barb may be able to help her more, because we've actually met Emily'

'You're incredible' said Charles, he turned to Delia and lent in to kiss her 'I love you so much'

'I love you too' said Delia and she closed the space between them. They broke apart and smiled at each other 'Hey! You promised to show us the videos of baby Lydia' said Delia 

'Well, lets go find them and get the Maitlands and Beej' said Charles, taking her hand and walking out of the bedroom

**Lydia:  
** Lydia appeared in her bedroom and immediately collapsed onto her bed, crying her eyes out. Just as she'd got her mother back, she was ripped away from her again. Why was life so cruel sometimes? Lydia sat up and, still with tears streaming down her face, she went to her wardrobe and grabbed her pile of photo albums. The one on-top was an album full of photos of her when she was a baby and toddler. Lydia sat cross legged on her bed and flicked through the album, smiling at every photo of her mother. The next album was her parents engagement and wedding album. She would never admit it infront of her father, but looking at the photos of her parents made her so happy and reminded her that love was real. 

'Whatcha looking at?' asked a deep voice and Lydia jumped. She turned around and saw Beetlejuice standing behind her

'Oh, hi Beej' she said sadly 'Just some old photo albums, you can look too if you want'

'Sweet' said Beetlejuice, jumping onto the bed and grabbing one of the albums 'Aww, baby Lyd' he said, looking at the photo 'You were a cute kid Lydia' Lydia smiled slightly and went back to looking at the photos of her mother

**Adam and Barbara:  
** The Maitlands landed in the attic, luckily on an old couch and not the hard floor. Adam got up and offered Barbara a hand up. As soon as she was on her feet, Barbara pulled Adam into a hug and laid her head on his shoulder, relishing the feeling of his familiar embrace. Adam wrapped his arms around her thin frame and resting his head on top of hers. 

'For once, I'm glad we didn't have kids' said Barbara quietly, after some time

'What do you mean honey?' asked Adam 

'Well, I would've felt so guilty about leaving them alone, and without both parents, that'd be so hard' she lifted her head off his shoulder and looked at him 'I'm glad I'm with you though'

'I'll never leave you' said Adam, running his thumb over her cheek bone and kissing her lightly 'I promise'

'We'd better go check on Lydia' said Barbara, and Adam nodded in agreement. The two of them walked downstairs, hand in hand and swinging their arms. On their way down, they met Charles and Delia, who told them they were going to watch videos of Lydia and asked them to tell Lydia and Beetlejuice. 

'Do we have to?' asked Lydia, putting the photo album down and looking up at Adam and Barbara, who nodded 'This is going to be super embarrassing'

'Oh come on' said Adam 'I'll give you a piggyback downstairs'

'Deal' said Lydia, she jumped onto Adam's back and looked at Barbara and Beetlejuice 'Come on, we'll have a race'

'Hope on Babs' said Beetlejuice. Barbara looked hesitant, but got onto Beetlejuice's back and held on tight. 

'Ready...'

'Set...'

'GO!'

Adam and Beetlejuice started running and tried to push each other out the way. Lydia and Barbara were screaming and laughing the whole way downstairs, and they reached Charles and Delia at the same time

'Good game' said Lydia, offering her hand to Barbara, who shook it 

'I demand a re-match' whispered Barbara, as they walked over to the couches 'You and me against the boys'

'Deal' said Lydia, cheering up a little. The family of 6 settled down on the couches and started to watch old videos of Lydia when she was a baby

**Emily:  
** Emily appeared back in the Netherworld, and remembered what Miss Argentina had told her. She quickly made her way to the beauty queens office and knocked on the door

'Come in' called Miss Argentina and Emily pushed the door open 'Ahh, yes, take a seat. I have good news for you, but you cannot tell anyone what I am letting you do' 

'What's up?' asked Emily, sitting down opposite the head of the Netherworld 

'I saw how much your family missed you, and I have decided that once a month, for a year, I will allow you to go and visit them' Emily's mouth dropped open 'However, you must help me train the ghosts in a song and dance number in return'

'Deal' said Emily, shaking Miss Argentina's hand 'Thank you so much'

'It is ok' said Miss Argentina, smiling. She got up and drew a door on her office wall 'You have 24 hours there, then you must return. You cannot leave the house, or let anyone else see you, ok?'

'Got it' said Emily 

'Good' said Miss Argentina, she knocked on the door three times and it opened. Emily waved goodbye to Miss Argentina and stepped through the door, entering the Maitlands/Deetz family room. 

'Mum?' asked Lydia in disbelief, looking up from her spot in between Barbara and her father 'What are you-'

'Miss Argentina' said Emily simply, going to sit next to Beetlejuice 'I'll explain later' she saw the video that was on the screen 'I want to watch this first'

'Please no' said Lydia, hiding her face in Barbara's shoulder, making everyone laugh and the teenager groan. 


	32. Extra Stuff

_**Beetlejuice:  
Nope, not buying it, time to die!** _

'You have no chill' exclaimed Lydia, throwing her hands in the air and looking at the demon 'NO CHILL'

_**Adam:  
Hold on one damn minute!** _

'Character. Development.' said Lydia, clapping her hands together between each word then she looked at the screen 'Aww, he's trembling' Adam blushed a little

'I think its adorable' said Barbara, kissing her husband on his pink cheek

_**Mr Beetlejuice, since we met... you have pinched me... and groped me... and harassed me, sir, and I wanna tell you infront of all these people... that... it... has... worked...** _

'I am so confused' muttered Emily

_**Everyone:  
WHAT?!** _

'Cover your eyes Sky' advised Delia

'Whats going to happen?' asked Sky innocently, not covering her eyes and turning her full attention to the screen

_**Adam:  
I want you, Beetlejuice, and I want everyone here to know it** _

'Sexy... I miss you kissing me like that' said Beetlejuice, crawling on his hands and knees over to Adam and looking up at him, puckering his lips for a kiss

'No Beej' said Adam firmly, putting a finger to the demons lips and pushing him away 'Absolutely not'

_**Barbara:  
How dare you   
*smack*** _

'I'm sorry-what?' gasped Lydia 'The Barbara Maitland Hit Her Husband?'

_**oh my god, did I really hit you-** _

'I still feel bad about that' mumbled Barbara, putting her head next to Adam

'It's fine honey' said Adam 'I know you were just acting'

_**Adam:  
Maitlands 2.0** _

'This is so weird' said Sky

_**Barbara:  
Maitlands 2.0- I mean, I'm angry!** _

'Why is her deep voice so cute?' whispered Sky

'Mood change much?' asked Charles

_**Because I too, am attracted to Mr Beetlejuice... ugh, we all are!** _

'I'm sorry, did this actually happen?' asked Emily

'Yup' said Beetlejuice, grinning up at the Maitlands 'every second of it... apart from the fact that I actually got to kiss Babs in real life'

'Eww, Beej, please stop' said Lydia

'I am so confused' said Sky

'Ditto' replied Emily

**~**

**Adam 3.0**

'So, someone made a puppet version of sexy?' asked Beetlejuice 'Thats so unfair! I want a puppet version of me!' he threw himself on the floor like a young child throwing a tantrum 

'I think thats a really funny, sweet, and creative way to leave a show' said Barbara 

'One night they should've just had him come on stage and sing with the puppet' said Delia 'I'd pay to see that'

**~**

**Curtain Call: Rob's Final (Because I feel like making myself sad) :**

When the ensemble came on, everyone cheered and clapped 

'Woo!' called Delia, forgetting she was watching it in a home and not live

'I love their outfits' said Sky 

Then, Maxie, Juno, Otho and Sky came onto bow

'Wow, they all get black and white versions of their costumes' said Charles 'Thats a nice touch'

'The person who plays me is so pretty!' said Sky, looking at Dana Steingold as she did her signature Girl Scout pose

'Wait, did the person who played Maxine also play Juno?' asked Delia, looking closely at the screen 

'Yes'

'They nailed Otho' said Lydia 'Only I wish he'd had a proper song, and not just a cut one'

'Hey, they recognised her for her role of Miss Argentina' said Delia, when Leslie Kritzer and Adam Dannheisser did their bow 'Thats good, she deserves it, that was an impressive song'

'The Maitlands!' cheered Emily

'Wait, why didn't she bow?' asked Barbara, when Kerry Butler just gestured for Rob McClure to bow again 

'This was his last show' said Amelia from the back of the room 

'Thats so sweet' said Emily

'Very Maitlandish' said Lydia. Adam and Barbara raised their eye brows at the word "Maitlandish" 

'THEY SAID MY NAME!' cried Beetlejuice thankfully, flopping onto the floor and throwing his hands in the air 'OH, I LOVE THESE PEOPLE!'

'They come out of the floor? No fair' pouted Sky 'I wanna do this show. Falling through the floor, floating in the air, setting stuff on fire, breaking stuff, fireworks, moving sets. This is awesome!' 

'Sounds a little scary' said Barbara 'But I agree, it'd be extremely fun'

'Woo! Beej and his sparkly suit' said Lydia, when Alex Brightman and Sofia Anne Caruso jumped off the platform in their sparkly outfits 

'I want one' announced Beetlejuice, before cheering loudly when Sophia took her bow 'Lyd gets a sparkly dress too!' 

'Aww, he looks so excited' said Emily, looking at Rob who was grinning like crazy 

'The Sandworm gets a bow!' cheered Beetlejuice 'Ahh! I love these people!' 

'Thats Sandy' said Amelia 

'Aww, they're all so supportive' said Barbara, watching as Alex picked Rob up and everyone hugged him 'Its so sweet'

'He got a lipstick mark from Lyd' said Beetlejuice.

'The way she just pats his back is just so Maitlandish and sweet' said Delia 'Why are they not together in real life?!'

'Because she's 11 years older than him' shrugged Amelia, walking over to the TV and turning the video off 'But I agree, they're adorable'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thats the end! Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed!


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